Posted in Home School, Who's the mom here?, Wisdom

For Home Educators, Only, Please.

"Negro mother teaching children numbers a...
Homeschooling– the magnet school for share croppers in Transylvania, Louisiana, 1939. How times have changed!

Note: Please do not read this if you are against home schooling. Thanks.

Should All Families Homeschool?

Our family once celebrated a quarter century of home schooling. I could hardly believe it. The time had sped by so fast – where was it?

I thought about the huge blessing the Lord had given us – He had been so gracious to us, taking us by the hand and leading us in a way that we did not know. We believe that the Lord made all the difference in how our children might have grown up.

Any child’s education is partly dependent upon his micro-culture. For instance, if our children had remained in our public schools, they would have learned things like chewing tobacco, as appropriate behavior for second-graders. I know the tobacco manufacturers would have agreed with me: Giving it to second graders is completely unacceptable. I know it was unacceptable to me, along with many similar ideas. Our home clearly was the best place for our children.

I gave my children the best possible education available to them at that time. If they’d been educated in England, how different their speech would have been! If they’d been educated in a wealthy neighborhood, how different their science courses would have been!

I happen to believe that the home is where all children belong.

Yes, I am one of those who believe that all families should homeschool. I hear you gasping but after I define terms, you might agree.

(There is still time to NOT read this.)

Please understand I have nothing against the idea of schools existing.

I just have problems with detaining helpless Americans against their will in a gun-free microcosm that cannot defend them, indeed refuses to attempt defending them, from physical, mental, emotional, or spiritual attack, and that both proscribes their religious beliefs (but only if they are Christian) and prescribes the superstitions of others upon them.

It just does not fit the American purpose and does not set well with this American.

Participating in such a micro-community should be an act that an informed adult freely chooses. He should be free to attend or to escape, as the need arises. The course content should please him and an appropriate level of autonomy should prevail.

Of course, I define a college or university. Amazing how a little free enterprise can elevate the quality of the goods offered for sale! Paying your own way or earning a scholarship can motivate you to behave and study hard, too.

Although there are degrees of excellence in the public and private colleges and universities, there also is freedom to go where we want, when we want, or to skip it altogether, if we want. That is how it should be.

If you are thinking that is fine for adults but it would be folly to burden children with such decisions, you are right.

That is why schools should be only for adults.

More tomorrow.

Posted in Believe it or not!, Blessings of Habit, Home School, Homemaking, Inspiring

What Is it Like to Homeschool? – part 2

Example of unschooling (home-based, interesed-...
These children are trying to dig out insects from tree bark.

Sneaky changes you WON’T know about!

You will hardly realize your mind is clearing and new direction is sneaking into your lives, but others will notice.

Homemaking

As you welcome the idea of being a maker of a real home for your family, you will realize that washing dishes is not such a horrible chore, after all. You may remind yourself of a powdered cleanser commercial as you clean the bathtub, but you will like it.

Gentler rewards.

The exercise will give a glow to your cheeks, too. In fact, with new work going on, you may actually begin needing small breaks. What’s more, you will find quiet for enjoying your reading during these breaks, and in your favorite comfy chair instead of a sterile “break room”.

Simplicity

As you discover the truer beauty of new, simpler recreations, you will realize it is a good thing, because your costs will shrink, too. You will become quite satisfied with less.

The children

The best change, though, will come over your children. Your heart will sing as your see competitiveness and the resulting nervousness falling off your children.

As you discover their true personalities, you will delight in re-making their acquaintances. As they discover the real you, in return, they will cooperate with you more. You will hardly believe your eyes as you watch your children simply being a family, together. No amount of running around would give this joy, and as there is less running around, there will be much more time for family.

More time

As this newfound time applies to all of life, the educational level and possibilities for your children will greatly increase. It will not be all book learning, either, as you give life to their understanding of the joys of industry and simplicity.

Last, you will find yourself face to face with a new self. It will be great. Old priorities will go out the window and new ones will jump in the front door just as fast. Your amazement at yourself will know no bounds, at first. Things you once shrugged off will take on great proportions and things that once bothered you greatly will seem insignificant.

For instance, instead of fixating on finding the best school supplies for your child, you may discover packing school supplies for Somalian orphans seems somehow more important.

You may acquire a new hobby of crochet or gardening or baking. You could sell your product or teach classes. You could bring joy to those around you.

Most importantly, though, you will never again wonder if you should home school your children. You will finally know. The knowing will bring such peace in knowing you are finally giving your children the best you can, finally doing what you were made to do.

Finally home.

Posted in Believe it or not!, Blessings of Habit, Home School, Inspiring

What Is it Like to Homeschool?

"Doing school" under a shade tree."

The parent who hopes or plans on home schooling probably wonders about it, what it must be like to be a homeschooler.

There are as many answers to this question as there are folks asking it, but the answer we all want, at first, is universal.

Entering the world of homeschooling is entering a whole new world.

It is a new world because immediately, the family realizes new freedom. Since the home school is YOUR school, the sense of liberty is immediate. You realize that you can do whatever you want, and you really like it.

You may choose to do everything just like a little school, but it will be your choice, not something forced upon you.

New Liberty

This new liberty will include the choice of curriculum and subjects. You will have freedom to choose a God-honoring curriculum. You will find yourself free to believe the entire Bible, if you choose, which will be a wonderful new freedom for you.

Along with the freedom to believe and study as you choose will come all sorts of other new possibilities. You could find yourself teaching your children all they need to become a missionaries, Creation scientists, midwives, herbalists, or any other of the fields that are off limits in the public arena.

New society.

As your new world makes these radical changes, your gladness will grow as you discover you also dwell within a new society. You will have new friends who will be happy to help you. You may need help, but it will be ever ready with these new friends.

As you learn to enjoy them, you will join them in their activities, new activities to you. Where you once had to chase ball games, you may find that you have more time to chase Frisbees or butterflies. Instead of hanging out at the school parking lot, you will find yourself hanging out at the observatory or park. You will like these new activities, and as you spend more and more time with these friends, your loving concern for them will grow.

Your concern will grow so much, in fact, that you may find yourself in a car full of folks riding to your State Capital to express those concerns. You may also find yourself enchanted at having the time for expressing such concerns.

You will enjoy these new friends because you will realize that they are a different sort of people. They smile a lot and their smiles are genuine. They reach out to you and you catch yourself looking forward to the next time you see them. You ask them questions because you like the differences you see in their families.

What you will not realize is that the same differences will be gradually appearing in your own family.

Read part two here!

 

Posted in Home School, Inspiring, Photos, Sayings, Who's the mom here?, Wisdom

Saturday Sayings – Create

English: Exterior view. Bronze tympanum, by Ol...
Bronze tympanum, by Olin L. Warner, representing Writing above main entrance doors. Library of Congress Thomas Jefferson Building, Washington, D.C.

As a writer watching my son survive college writing classes,

knowing his personality and his wrong language tendencies,

I’ve concluded that, at least sometimes,

we cushion our message in “thesaurus words” because we fear a harsh reaction.

Only a long time writer knows:

no matter how you cushion it,

harsh reactions will spring up.

When creating matters more to me than my ego,

then it improves.

__________________________

photo credit: wikipedia

Posted in Blessings of Habit, Home School, Inspiring, Photos, Who's the mom here?, Wisdom

Is There Life After Homeschool?

English: Motivations regarded most important f...
Motivations regarded most important for homeschooling among parents in 2007. Source: 1.5 Million Homeschooled Students in the United States in 2007 Issue Brief from Institute of Education Sciences, U.S. Department of Education. December 2008. NCES 2009–030

Every summer, it begins again: Some people must check it out — Are we really supposed to be doing this home schooling thing? Really? Are we sure?

There is a reason for that: They worry about their children’s futures. Of course, this is the function of parents, but because home schooling is so “new”, many are unaware of what the future holds.

With that in mind, I submit the following long post. Hope you enjoy it.

I have to say there is definitely a future for your home-educated child. Many predict that is impossible. They don’t understand.

I know, because I have been to the future.

My husband and I, together with what were to become some of our dearest friends, began home schooling about 30 years ago. Can you believe that? I almost cannot. It was nearly unheard of, back then. There were no home-school web sites, no support groups, no magazines, no newsletters, and almost no other people to . . . well, I guess you could say we are antiques.

Some thought we were breaking the law.

Our families would not speak to us.

We did not know where the adventure would go, but we did know where WE would not go. Home schooling cost us in many ways (but not much, monetarily) and we knew we could never throw away such a costly advantage.

That was enough to keep us going, back then.

Now days, though, people are seeing fruit. We’ve been there and done it and some of us have written the books. In some cases, we literally have helped the colleges rewrite their admissions policies to accommodate us. Our children have gone to college, passing CLEP tests, and earning scholarships. I relate this to show that entering college is much easier for home scholars, now, because schools court us.

Yes, in these days of crumbling social skills, the colleges still know how to woo parents.

Does this startle you? It should not.

Think for a moment: The national study that delineates what causes improved learning reads as if someone had been watching our home schools. Everything that home schooling parents do, from start to finish, is in that study. Unknown to us, or to them, ours is the only set of circumstances deliberately designed to enable the teacher to do everything right.

So, of course, our children are set up to succeed.

Then, surprise, surprise: another study, one that investigated who was doing best in college, found that it was not the public, nor the private schools, but home scholars, all grown up, crunching the books.

No wonder people want our kids.

Mention homeschool and you get the job. Have you noticed that? We have. In any imaginable field, what we are speaks so loudly, they do not need to hear what we say. It is the life-style, the diligence, and the discipline, which make us attractive.

People wish they could be like us.

Lacking that, they hope to hire our children. It is as if they are casting a vote for our way of life, by helping our children along. In this wrong, wrong world, they have found something that is dependably right, RIGHT, RIGHT, and they like it. So many people are so glad simply to see a clean, healthy young person who does not have a chip on his shoulder—it just makes their day, gives them hope, eases their worries a little.

It should.

You see, somewhere, deep inside every person, is the witness that the Lord’s ways are altogether good and right. Some people will never acknowledge that, but they cannot help but be glad when they see something they can recognize as good and right, whether they acknowledge it as coming from the Lord or not.

They have seen plenty of the other results, of the world’s ways.

There is not a person on this earth, I hope, who thinks it is good that children are murdered at school. No one thinks that the children should be blowing up the schools. Who, in his right mind would approve of drug dealing in the hallways?

So we agree that we should go on with this home-school idea, although we do not feel like it, maybe. The days come, though, when we don’t think that we can do it, right?

Why not?

Some of us are undisciplined.

I have heard it so often: “I don’t have the patience (organizing skills, energy, time, or whatever) to home school.” We have always answered with, “Neither did we. But we wanted to acquire those skills, and home schooling taught us how.” Actually, though, it was the Lord teaching us new heights of self-discipline. He wants to do that for all of His children.

We need a new perspective on life in general, and on home schooling in particular. If God has given us children, for their sakes we must begin to concentrate on the after effects of our actions with them. We dare not come to the end of our schooldays saying,

“I just did not have my act together.”

Some of us are just tired.

As your children age, guess what—you do too. Bones hurt, and muscles weaken and stiffen. What would you do if you worked in a public school and your joints were bothering you? Would you still get up and go to work? Of course you would. If you did not even care about the children who were depending on you to teach them, you still would think about the principal, school board, and superintendent and their responses.

Well, now your husband is your principal, your support group is your school board, and God is your superintendent. You can go on. Otherwise you must someday say,

“I just grew weary in well-doing.”

Some of us are afraid.

We think we do not have what it takes to teach higher levels. I want to encourage you by saying that although I only made “B’s and C’s” in high school math, I could remember what I had learned, thirty years later, well enough to help my children puzzle out their problems.

The moral is that if you ever learned it, it probably is still “up there” somewhere amongst the clutter of your busy mind.

Actually, what I found, was that from phonics to geometry to history and beyond, I never really learned much in the state institution that I went to, and am just now beginning to appreciate and retain these facts. I never learned to write until after all my formal schooling was over.

Maybe it is just that you learn more when you teach. I know the home school methods have been “officially pronounced” the best for actual learning. You actually, probably do have all you need to teach your older children.  The parts you forgot are about to be remedied—something you have needed for a long time. It will not be good to come to the end of the school journey saying,

“I gave up because I was afraid.”

Some of us truly did not ever study some subjects.

  • Perhaps you were in an institution that emphasized sports or movies, or did not teach.
  • Maybe somehow you escaped or fell through the cracks or quit or just could not grasp it.
  • Perhaps you had or have a learning disability yourself.

Mother, please, please do not think you are excluded or disqualified from the joy of finishing your older children’s education. There are several ways to make it happen:

  1. There are entire courses of lecture available on video or audiotapes. You do not have to know anything except how to pop in a tape.
  2. There are your friends at the support group. Ask and discover who is good in English or math. Realize that they probably would be, and rightfully should be, very glad to support you in your endeavors.
  3. There are the people in your community, who want to cast their vote in your direction, as I was saying. One of my best friends, a college math teacher who has remained childless, delights to answer my questions, although they usually are way below her level of expertise. I try not to wear her out, but if I am stumped (which happens in algebra II) I call her. She loves it so much and we have a good conversation to top it off.

You can find this type of help, too. You dare not send your child back into the same system that failed you. There has to be a better way. Learn with your child. Otherwise, all you can say, at the end, is,

 “I didn’t try hard enough.”

Some of us fear that we will somehow harm our children.

As long as you realize this possibility exists, and as long as you dread it, you are precisely the person who should be teaching your children. People who think they can do no wrong do not approach children with a good sense of dread of error. They are the ones who lead them astray, use them for guinea pigs in psychological experiments, and just plain teach them wrong.

I will not tell you that you will never make a mistake.

I certainly could not tell you that from my own experience.

If you care this much about your child, though, casting him into the public arena is what you must NEVER do. This is nearly guaranteed to harm your child. Keeping him near the life of God in you is what he needs. Even if you make mistakes, he can learn from them, too.

According to Solomon, those who fear harming the children are the ones who should raise them and not any others who could not be able to care as much. Do not plan someday to say,

 “God’s grace was not sufficient.”

I am past fifty years old and (at the time of the original writing) still have two teens to finish schooling. Sure, I am tired, some days. (Who isn’t?)

Yes, I have to look up things or reread the teacher book, some days. (The same for cookbooks.)

Of course, I have to find someone to help me, some days. (With plumbing, with doctoring, and with schooling.)

And, I have, I have made mistakes, missed the mark, some days. (In possibly every aspect of life.)

Nevertheless, there is one thing I do every day—I look into the eyes of my children and see clear-headed humanity looking back at me, not mass-produced confusion. That is life—true life.

It is the life that comes after home school.

__________________

Photo credit: Wikipedia.

Posted in Blessings of Habit, Home School, Inspiring

Summing up Summer

Green common beans on the plant.
Green beans. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Do you ever come to the end of the summer vacation with NO IDEA where the days went?

I have found a solution that we love, that worked several summers for us.

We kept a journal.

It wasn’t fancy—just some lined paper stapled between construction paper, but we made it more fun than it sounds. You may want to copy this idea.

After the children chose the color for their journal cover, they took turns adding decorations to the front. These usually were made with crayon and stencil, for ease and speed, but you could do some creative cut and paste and make the cover, itself, part of the event.

My kids are so no-nonsense.

You will need enough pages for the whole summer, say, ninety days. We eventually made ours simple as possible, but if you would like illustrations along the way, inside your journal, you will have to allow more pages. We would put two day’s of activities on each page, in a list form.

Some days’ activities were planned for us. We always shopped on Tuesdays, for instance. When green beans HAD to be canned, they just had to be, regardless of our wishes. Excess rains might mean an extra mopping chore. No matter. Whatever we did, we recorded.

The other minor rule we used was that we would do two note-worthy things each day. They did not have to be magnificent or impressive; they just had to be things we actually DID. Of course, the children preferred writing about the fair and the water park, but our goal was to realize where the summer went, and if it went to mopping and canning, then so be it.

In the end, we had a great little reminder of each day, plus a good grasp on where all those days went. Try it this summer, and see!

Posted in Home School, Inspiring, Photos, Wisdom

About to Burn Out?

This year I was not very organized.

Last year I posted my introductions to my workshops just before the annual conference I attend. Then, I spoke on household organization, living on a single income, and  homeschool startup.

One thing different, this year: I was formulating my very first solo PowerPoint presentations. (Yeah, I know, NOW that they are becoming passé!) I was totally consumed with learning this new-to-me tool.

Another big difference was that I am now doing everything here, myself. No kids to help out. So, while there is less dust falling, less mud gobbing, and less bathtub ringing, every single daytime chore has fallen onto me. Hubs helps with things when he’s here, evenings, but . . .

Third—and I realize there is reason to rejoice for each of these—we now spend at least one whole day, per week, in another town, working on our possible second career.

So I could not work ahead and schedule posts for while I was gone. The best I could do was drag my laptop along and try to keep up with y’all.

Therefore, I have decided to try something different, which is to condense my topics into blog posts so you can see if you would like to order, soon, the audio version of them on CD. I receive no payment, but would be happy to share these with you.

I did speak on burnout. Moms, with all the kids at home and all the neighbors gone cha$ing rainbow$, can burn out. What does that look like?

It comes in two stages, both related to fire, as I related in my workshop.

The exciting stage of burnout looks like an explosion. Mom goes berserk and soon will have nothing left to give. The more lack-luster stage looks more like what we call it, “burnout”, because Mom is plain gone, out of fuel, spent.

Nothin' cold as ashes . . .
Nothin’ cold as ashes . . .

I once posted on the song, “Pass it On” which begins: “It only takes a spark to get a fire going.” In that post, I told of how to build a one-match fire in the fireplace, and that was my intro to this workshop. However, I quickly relocated that fire in a forest and told of what foresters do to prevent forest fires.

They fight fire with fire.

In the cooler seasons when fire danger is low, they start a smart fire that can easily be controlled. They actually call this fire a “control burn”. Using drip torches, they, YES, start a forest fire, carefully watched by several professionals wielding special heavy-duty rakes and shovels, and backed up with bulldozers. The purpose is to remove all the dead, deadly debris on the forest floor, making it difficult to ignite with a careless cigarette thrown out on a hot, windy day. These lower temperature fires do no damage to mature trees, because the thick bark on them insulates the living part of the tree from the lower heat.

It’s a bit like an immunization for a forest.*

And I wonder—what kind of “debris” is in my life, that could cause a big “fire” with just the right spark and leave us with everything within me — gone?

And I wonder that about yours, too.

* (Incidentally, your state probably provides heavy fines for doing this at home, without knowing what you are doing. Don’t play with fire.)