Category: Inspiring

Posted in Home School, Inspiring, Wisdom

Click “Undo” – 4

Posted on by Katharine

If you are behind on reading this series on bringing home the rescued child, you may find Part 1 here.

Part 2 here.

Part 3 here.

Fifth, measure what he knows. Obtain a progress test or a placement test but do not administer it to him; go over it with him. (It does not have to relate to your curriculum, if you can transfer the results.) As you learn where he needs to begin studying, record what he knows. Then, as his knowledge increases, reward what he knows.

Measure, record, and reward—keep these three processes in mind a lot, in the beginning.

  • Learn how he best can learn. If experience has taught him to scorn reading, give him many oral and hands-on lessons. If he dislikes fiddling with props, hand him many glorious books.
  • Chart where he is and where he needs to be and graph his progress as it happens.
  • Break down any catch-up plans into a schedule with an estimated time of completion.

Then you can say things like, “By Thanksgiving, you will know the times tables!” or, “Doing an extra page weekly will finish this unit before our trip!” or, “When you are fifteen, you will be ready to begin chemistry!” Help him see that the little bites eventually whittle the entire project into an imaginable size.

Sixth, realize one thing you both have in common: You both know that home schooling is better, in spite of any fuss he may be projecting or any fears you may be hiding.

If he has been behind, your child may have tried to save face by pretending pleasure with a poor performance that he could not improve. To succeed in the real world may have seemed impossible to him. The child who has become proud of failure is trying to invent a new social structure in which he can seem “okay”.

If your child is in this sad state, you have two big jobs:

  1. To help him understand that home school is another reinvented social structure in which having failed is okay, but also in which failure will be replaced with success; and
  2. To guide him into learning, and showing that success. He knows you are right, but fears to believe it could be possible. Paralyzing fear will melt as soon as progress begins.

Alternately, if he has been stifled in a class that is behind him in achievement level, he may have to learn to overcome laziness with a new love for excellence. He will need your help, no matter where he was or where he needs to be. Yes, he needs you; that is why God made parents. You can inspire him with:

  1. The idea of beginning college early, or with
  2. Extracurricular activities for finishing early in the day.

Most importantly, in either case you must help your child see that excellence is its own reward.

Last in series tomorrow.

Posted in Home School, Inspiring, Who's the mom here?, Wisdom

Click “Undo” – 3

Posted on by Katharine

We continue our series on breaking in the new, unsure homeschooler.

If you’ve missed parts one and two of this series, you can read Part 1 here, and Part 2 here.

Fourth—deal with the feelings. Someone who is freshly released from a prison, or an unarmed police state, often will have difficulty handling absolute freedom.

Well, your child has been in an environment of rigid conformity that probably was much like a military base. Uniforms, bells, lines, roll-calls, schedules, harsh authorities, numbers, assemblies, lock-step, attention, fear-motivation, institutional colors, institutional food, lockers, compartments…how much does it take to dehumanize a person?

These tactics belong in the military, which needs to move like a machine.

Your newly rescued “cog” may balk at his new, normal life.

Imagine:

  • not feeling guilty about getting a full night’s sleep, while the bus rumbles by.
  • having time to chew and enjoy your breakfast.
  • being okay without shoes on.

Although it might seem incomprehensible, very much of this can make a newly freed person feel like the bottom has dropped out.

Of course, you have rules, but they may seem too lenient for this child, at first.

Alternately, he may have been starving for just this type of freedom, and decide to resist any type of boundary.

Either way, be prepared for testing, since you will find yourself a “new” authority in the eyes of your child. Rules, firmly but gently enforced, should help.

The gentle approach is very important.

One of the most comforting, uplifting, and rewarding things you can do for an unsure home school student is to point out all the objectionable activities, treatments, and attitudes, that he is missing. Smiling while saying things like, “Well, it’s time for math at the school,” will help him remember unpleasant occurrences that he was glad to leave. If you can manage to be working on a fun art project or baking bread when you drop such a reminder, he will feel doubly blessed by comparison.

Homeschooler challenging The Leaning Tower of ...
(Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Yes, “perks” are very important in a home school.

Actually, they are important to everyone, everywhere, but so few people work to provide the important things for children. This is one way that a home school can be better.

Although we do not want to give a child a demanding attitude, we can make him feel pampered or even slightly spoiled with something as simple as a small bouquet at breakfast or even just a cookie, judiciously applied.

Other perks might be:

  • schooling barefoot
  • owning a new pet
  • studying in a tree
  • skipping one afternoon per week
  • schooling with a new friend or at Grandmother’s once a week
  • having a source of income during the day
  • taking a week of vacation with Dad’s business trip
  • ice cream after every tennis lesson
  • expanding his personal hobby via his studies

Long recesses on a snowy day, followed by hot cocoa with a marshmallow could not fail to make the new homeschooler feel a little more human. He knows his old friends are sitting in a stale room, looking at the snow outside, and wishing.

Great field trips, even in the summer, can help him realize his importance in your eyes. He knows how tedious and seldom the field trips were, before, or he may even have failed to qualify for them.

More tomorrow.

Icon for 'undo', based partially on Image:Circ...
Undo

Icon for ‘undo’, based partially on Image:Circle-contradict.svg. Intended for general use (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

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Posted in Home School, Inspiring, Wisdom

Click “Undo” – 2

Posted on by Katharine

Yesterday we began a series about how to begin home educating a child who is acclimatized to the collective school situation and may be reluctant about this big change in his life. You may want to catch up, here.

The second step is somehow to teach your child also to care more.

Unless your child has begged for rescue from the collective system, he may not see what you see or care about what you care about (his welfare).

He may not be comfortable with the idea that his education or his life is worth caring about.

He may not realize that it is now safe for him to care about life.

Affirmations of thankfulness and celebration about his new presence in your daily affairs will help him see a glimpse of it. As your actions follow your words, he will begin to believe it, and to feel some of the same, himself.

School buses congestionThe third step is to help your child understand what is happening in his life.

Even if he begged to home school, he is accustomed to a regime of bells jangling and other buffeting noises, dependent upon someone else telling him every move to make, and missing his old friends.

Now someone (you) must deal with this regimented, buffeted, dependent, and friendless soul who is moping at your kitchen table.

How do you explain? You start with God. If you have not had much time to minister God to your child, take it easy—you do not want to overwhelm him and you cannot force him.

You will have a long time to get your whole school right, but you have only now to get now right. Proceed humbly. Pray without ceasing.

If he does understand the concept of knowing God’s will, you can tell him that you are obeying God, and that sometimes that means changes that do not feel comfortable. There always is some other way that seems right to us. (Proverbs ­­­­­­­­­­­­­­14:12, 16:25)

Confess that you could not or would not hear God, before, which is how you both got to where you are now. Yes, confess. Apologize and ask for forgiveness. You, dear parent, have wasted a portion of the life of this child, who was at your mercy, leading him to learn to enjoy the world’s ways; you have seen the coming consequences; and you have repented. Now you must woo a child of the world to see the light of God’s glorious way for His people. Your humble, repeated apology will help him see that the old way was wrong and that when he longs for it, he too is wrong. Do not expect him to see it at first, but do tell him, often, how sorry you are and do not merely tell him. Show him. Make amends, somehow. Often.

More tomorrow.

Free Spa Day!

Here’s how to get yourself a free spa day, local to you, wherever you live.

  1. Take the money you would have spent on paying a spa and use it to buy a really good push mower.
  2. Crank ‘er up on a warm, steamy day, like today.
  3. Go at it for at least a half hour.

Here’s what all is included in this package:

  1. Aerobic workout, coupled with weight training.
  2. Tanning session that’s safer than using a tanning bed.
  3. Ozone-treated sauna session.
  4. Cool shower. (Well, I assume you’ll go for that, just inside the door, right?)
English: A Ukrainian straw hat Українська: Укр...
A Ukrainian straw hat (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Some precautions:

  1. If you burn easily, or if it’s your first-ever venture into the great outdoors for any length of time, use sunscreen.
  2. Wear a broad-brimmed straw hat, preferably one with vents in the crown. If your hands are tender, you might want to wear gloves, also.
  3. Wet a small towel, such as a hand towel, somewhat drippy, and double it, lengthwise, over the back of your neck. Wear this the entire time you are outdoors, as a sort of coolant.
  4. Take breaks every half hour. These breaks can include swapping out the washer/dryer, because you love multi-tasking. These breaks must include being in from the heat and using a fan to cool off a bit, drinking a huge glass of water that is not too icy, and resting in a seated position.
  5. You may want to limit how much you do the first time out, depending on your age, sun-sensitivity, and tolerance to exercise. Check up on all that are appropriate from this list: pulse, blood pressure, blood sugar, even temperature, if you’re not sure.

That’s it. It is such a great workout! Have FUN!

Posted in Home School, Inspiring, Scripture, Who's the mom here?, Wisdom

Click “Undo”

Posted on by Katharine

Click Undo!

Train up a child in the way he should go and when he is old he will not depart from it.

(Proverbs 22:6)

Now you’ve done it:

You have finally brought your baby (who happens to be fourteen years old!) home to live happily ever after with you.

You have planned and dreamed and now you are so excited.

The trouble is that now you do not know what to do with this child you hardly recognize and you have to deal with the years he has spent away from his loving home.

Is that how it is for you? How do I know? We have been there, is how. Because the laws in our state had not always protected home schooling, our oldest had spent six years in the public system and nearly two in a similar private system. He had much to unlearn, since children can acquire many ideas we do not want them to learn, and miss the important things.

Why do they pick up things we do not desire? It is because we have not been bringing them up in the ways they should go, according to God’s command. I can say that because if our children have been in any type of collective institution, then we have not been bringing them up much AT ALL.

Someone else has.

We only greeted them as they passed through our lives, doing the bidding of those who were bringing them up. It is so sad and so wrong that the wisest man ever, Solomon, himself, made a special judgment regarding such things. He knew that the real parent would really care. (1 Kings 3) Maybe that is one reason God commanded us to bring them up, not to send them away to someone else. The assumption is that we would truly care.

If we have missed this mark until now, what do we do?

How do we make it right?

Where do we start?

The first step is already done: Bringing your child home is the first step.

Something inside you is waking up and beginning to commit to caring for him more. You have made a good start, already, and do not forget it, because many would like to make you think that this excellent start is really the start of all your problems.

Actually, you already had problems; you are just now beginning to see them. Finding and facing the problems is a great first step.

More tomorrow.

Dad and son
Dad and son (Photo credit: narice28)

 

 

Having children does not make a rich man poor! Having children makes a poor man rich!

You cannot take your riches to Heaven with you after you die, no matter how much you may try. But if you try hard you may accomplish one day having your children with you in Heaven after you die.

 

Overheard – Kids!

Quote• Posted on by Katharine