Motivations regarded most important for homeschooling among parents in 2007. Source: 1.5 Million Homeschooled Students in the United States in 2007 Issue Brief from Institute of Education Sciences, U.S. Department of Education. December 2008. NCES 2009–030 (Photo credit: Wikipedia)
School is almost upon us for the year. That means it is high time to look at your school choices.
Especially if you are unhappy with your collective school, you need to think about slipping out of that situation and readying yourself and your children for schooling at home.
I hope you’ve spent quality time thinking about your children and their future. I hope you’ve inspected a bit of curriculum and even used my curriculum guide, which begins here.
You have hardly a month for organizing your life around a new normal.
You need to start now.
Your curriculum company and your children will be grateful if you do not wait until the week before school begins (as too many other people do) to place your order, expecting it to arrive timely. Timely arrival follows timely ordering. Like, hurry…
Okay.
With that in mind, I’d like to direct you to the homeschooling posts on this site, created just for you, for inspiring, motivating, guiding, and helping you make the transition.
Oh, and if you just need a booster and wish someone would give the beginning lectures to you all over again, hey, help yourself to these! You are welcome!
Okay, how about a look at what success in home schooling really IS? The first axiom is:
The commitment is to your child, in obedience to the Lord.
Forget excuses about having tried; it is about your child and God. It is a sober-minded decision to do the right thing with the children He has given you. No matter what, you will blaze past trying, to continuing, which is the best way to prevent becoming a quitter.
Just as you would not think of quitting on the commitment with your spouse, do not do so regarding your children.
Another very obvious help to success in home school is this:
Be at home.
Yes, there are exceptions, such as my friend who managed the very first semester of her home school in hospital waiting rooms because of a tragic accident in her family. Still, that is not the goal, as my friend would assure you.
We do not want to plan to home school on the run. When we home school, we must change our lifestyle so we can be at home.
So many parents self-prescribe home school like a capsule for the remedy of problems in their children. Rather, it is you, Mom–your scent, your voice, the feel of your skin, something no other woman on earth can provide–you are the medicine that your child needs. (Did you know that hugged children are healthier, grow more, and learn faster than abandoned ones?)
The most important motto that I would suggest is:
Listen to God and follow what you know.
The world of home school advice is overflowing with counsel that is very good, but most of it is for someone else. You must mature to the place of knowing, instead of wondering or doubting.
How can we stand if we do not know what to do or even what we are doing? No matter if your whole support group is doing differently from you—or if they are doing the same—you must do what you know is perfect for you and your children, because you received it from the hand of God. There is a lot that I cannot tell you, but He can. Learn to hear Him.
The main subject and the main goal in all home schools should be Godliness. Many of us realize that. The trouble is that most folks do not realize this truth:
When we model Godliness, then we teach it.
The reverse, sadly, also is true. You must model Godliness even when you are teaching something as seemingly neutral as math. If you fret or yell to teach math, you are mostly teaching impatience, not math. Oh, they may also learn the math that you are presenting (just about anyone can) and with many reviews will probably retain a lot of it.
They will learn the impatience that we are modeling, though, in just one easy lesson and they will remember it a long time.
Modeling Godliness is the main ingredient in the successful home school. Without it, there is little benefit from teaching the rest.
So, I would hang a few mottoes on my walls, after all, I suppose. You can use them, too, if you want:
Commit, for your children’s sakes.
Be at home.
Listen to God.
Model Godliness.
Determine to obey Him and He will give you success in teaching your children.
If “trying” really means aiming at success, then, how to succeed really is the question. Let’s consider some of the sayings that belong to real success in home schooling. You may be surprised.
First, we do not want to do what some moms do, which is merely to take a stab at it. For these moms, it is not well-thought-out at all.
They just “give it a whirl”.
They do not pray.
They do not ask their husbands.
They do not research.
Remember this maxim:
Education is preparing your child for life.
It is not a hobby. It is more important than a new nail polish color, not something you try out and then abandon. It is nothing less than a life decision. In these days, many are beginning to call it a life-and-death decision.
Another:
Home schooling is not about curriculum.
Yes, you probably need curriculum, (although some do fine without), but you can visit with hundreds of families at any home school convention, and you will find thousands of folks succeeding, while using every imaginable curriculum made.
For instance, any child who is ready to learn to read can do so with almost any decent phonics curriculum.
Sure, there may be only one company “out there” perfectly able to meet your needs or style.
Yes, you probably need to shop with an unbiased veteran a time or two.
Still, as far as all the proven curriculum companies go, they are proven. Do not continually put on and take off curriculum until it is too late to accomplish anything. That is not trying to succeed at home schooling; it is merely trying, and at the wrong goal, at that.
I repeat, it is not about curriculum; trying on curriculum is not the same as home schooling.
One other surprising truth about home schooling is:
Usually, it is easy to do well without trying very hard.
For many, it is a little like falling out of bed, actually. The simple fact that the children are at home, instead of out on their own, will make them smarter. Yes, the act of being at home, by itself, will make your children smarter.
Of course, we want them to learn as much as possible, and we will take every opportunity to ensure that this is happening, but bringing them home, in and of itself, makes worlds of difference. They will no longer feel forced to waste mental energy on peer pressure, self-preservation, and competitiveness. They will be able to relax and the elimination of great stress will free them to excel.
Then there is the other side of it: they will have much, much less to un-learn.
Often our children at home seem accidentally to learn more than we expected, solely because they are in a more learning-conducive setting. It is much like osmosis.
This is, I admit, a lot of re-arranging to wrap our thinking around.
I often get asked about the one piece of advice I would give to all home schoolers. Probably folks want some type of motto that fits all situations and clears the air about many problems. I have thought and thought about this, and—for now, anyway—I think the best I can do is to say: “DO NOT TRY HOME SCHOOLING.”
Surely, you think, this advice does not belong on a blogsite dedicated to the advancement of the home school experience. However, it is enlightening to look at what happens when we try home schooling.
First, a definition.
“Try” is a worn out word. An example of good usage is in the old saying, “If you don’t at once succeed, try, try, again.” We can learn a lot from this adage. For instance, we can learn that the purpose of trying is succeeding.
Imagine.
How many folks say they have tried the idea of home schooling, when actually, they only dropped the H-bomb at the dinner table and met with opposition from some child who is badly in need of it? Or maybe they bought an inane, dime-store book or two, and someone worked the first few pages and became disenchanted. Who wouldn’t.
Encountering resistance is not the same as trying.
Pressing against the resistance, with the determination to overcome it, is what trying really is. If a child balks, a relative whines, or a neighbor threatens, what makes us think it’s suddenly time to stop? We must see that type of trying is really just letting those around us dictate our convictions to us. If we are not trying to succeed, we have missed the whole idea.
The goal is not to try; the goal is to succeed.
Once I realized that, I could think of several great sayings that belong to real success in home schooling. Check here for more about goals!
It happened during our tiny tornado that passed over us and never did a bit of damage except for felling one oak tree in the woods.
We saw the clouds coming. We knew the predicted danger was upon us. Watching it was like watching time-lapse photography. I’ve never seen clouds approach so fast.
We were ready. We have a basement and I was about to suggest we go there, except the amazing display of the skies held me entranced. There was no funnel cloud, just incredible force.
Incredible force.
Think: Can you move a tree? Even a small tree, such as an apple, is difficult to shake, even when we desperately want those apples. Yet, huge trees, with branches as large as some tree trunks, were swaying as if they were grass, as if they were dancing. Do they like tornadoes? Do they love the chance to sway like the grass? It seemed it.
Yet, reality kept me in check: Water was leaking under the front storm door, impossible except during tornadoes. As I fetched a couple of old towels from the laundry room, to protect our living room floor, I heard the honking of an automobile through the exterior door. I heard the wild, mad, honking of someone desperate.
My husband had the sense to open the door, exactly at the moment the banging began. There stood a rain-drenched woman, blonde and petite.
“Oh, PLEASE let me come into your house! Please let me come in!” she begged, trembling all over and almost jumping in the door once we opened it.
Who could deny such a request at such a time?
So it was that she stood just inside the laundry room, dripping, running, water all over the tiles. She blessed us, thanked us, and blessed us again. And I stood, dumbly, astonished, with two towels in my hands, finally thinking to thrust them at her. She began drying herself as if she were a family member. Mentally, I remembered the flooding front door, and I remembered the Scriptures: do not neglect entertaining strangers, for thereby, some have entertained angels, unaware… (Or something like it–that was how I was remembering it.)
As if she were an angel, we encouraged her to come inside the rest of the house. We anticipated a black-out and wanted her where we could seat her if darkness made our unfamiliar house a hazard to her. We offered her more towels and a drink. We showed her the astonishing view outside our front door, as more storm flew over us. We apologized as we needed to tend to that water coming in with more towels.
She, feeling SO at home, asked to borrow a phone. She told her mother she was okay, but would be late. We chatted. The storm passed.
Then she apologized: She usually drives through a storm unafraid, she said, but this one was like NOTHING she had ever seen before. We assured her we felt the same and she was extremely wise not to drive in such wind with the ground so saturated that trees might fall across her path, or even on her car. She thanked us profusely and promised to bring us a cake. We told her we would love a cake, but she owed us nothing.
Then she left for where she belonged, and, just like that, this golden moment of people helping people was over.
Ever wonder when would be the best time to begin a new project?
I do that from time to time.
And when we spend a great deal of time deciding when to begin, we are wasting time.
Wouldn’t it help to have a plan for when to begin a project?
Yes it would.
We often do not realize there are three basic types of projects, each with a sensible set of parameters that nearly dictate how to decide when to begin.
First, there is the long-term, self-started, easily interrupted project.
Crocheting an afghan for that wedding scheduled for next spring? Yes, you could begin it any day. It’s so far away, when you begin is not very important.
The best time to begin, if you really want to accomplish this project, is now.
Today. As soon as you finish reading this post.
Realize that beginning such a project includes, first, scheduling its progress. Scheduling means counting the units of the project such as skeins of yarn, and comparing to the time left, such as six months. Does the afghan include 12 skeins of yarn? Then you must complete two skeins every month, one-half skein every week.
Scheduling such a huge project this way accomplishes three objectives:
You will realize you must begin soon.
You will see how easy it will be to finish on time.
You will know, immediately, when you need to stay up past bedtime or work while talking on the phone, thus avoiding putting it all off until it’s too late.
Second, the Help You Promised to Provide
Get roped into making cookies for the next event at church? Promised to present a workshop at the ladies’ retreat? Someone counting on you to . . .
. . . It doesn’t really matter what we place in the blank, here, you have given your word you will do this thing. On time.
Guess when the best time is, to begin.
Now.
Immediately.
This is a matter nearly of life/death importance: It is your word. At least you can find the recipe and make sure you have all the ingredients. At least you can make an outline of the points you hope to present in the workshop, or a list of the visual aids you will need.
When I promise to bring something to somewhere, I often place that thing in my purse or in my car, immediately, before I forget. Then it’s done. If I arrive at the appointed place, it will be there with me. If I am not home when I give my word, I record a note to myself in my “palm pilot”. These notes MUST be dealt with before my next shampoo, or they will be erased. I know that and act accordingly.
Even if I say I will provide the thing next WEEK, it goes into the car NOW (unless it will melt, in which case it goes by the front door, in the way or even hung from the doorknob, obviously outward-bound.) With food items, I post a sticky note on the door at eye level, then another on the steering wheel of the car.
And when you say you will pray for someone, do so in the next breath, especially if you say this in an email. Then it’s done, and the prayer-ee will notice any effects, such as unexplainable peace, immediately, and remember it came from God.
Third, Those Projects You Wish You Could Accomplish
No one really cares if your kitchen is reorganized, but you wish it. Few will notice the grass in your day lilies, but you’d like to get it out of there. No one but you knows how messy your filing system on your laptop is, but it’s driving you slowly and completely crazy.
Begin now, by scheduling a non-negotiable time, each day, to work on it. By non-negotiable, I mean telling the children, “You know Mom has to fix the kitchen (flower bed, computer) right now, every day, so can it wait?” I consider interruptions akin to interrupting a phone call, if I am keeping a promise to myself. Children can even answer the phone for you while you are elbow-deep in kitchen utensils, you know, and you can train them to answer however you want, such as: “Mom is at work, right now. May she call back later? Thanks!”
So: At 10:00 each morning, I will empty one kitchen drawer, get the ick-o out of it, hammer the thing back together better, re-line it with new liner, eliminate the extraneous contents, and reload. It only takes a half hour, or less, and you will not believe how much more you’ll like yourself at 10:30.
OR: At 6:30 each morning, I will pull the grass from the day lilies for ½ hour.
OR: At 10:00 each night, I will get the misfiled folders out of one file and find all the missing things that should be in it.
Then give yourself another such kiss and hug tomorrow, on schedule.
I know, it seems like so much work, it seems so far away, it seems I’d never forget such a promise. However, the truth is that if we decide NOW how to deal with these challenges, we succeed. He who fails to plan, plans to fail.
Home's Cool! 