View of the deck through branches of a small maple.
All the beauty of an ice storm comes with a price: We lose electricity.
So after we had a nice* game of Scrabble-by-candlelight, we ate a great chili dinner by the same romantic candlelight, chili which I’d cooked on our wood stove.
Then I did dishes by candlelight.
Am seriously considering doing dishes by candlelight all the time. So romantic… 😉
Just read a darling story about a guy who was, like me, a writer, but, who, not like me, had one published book under his belt and another on the way. He wrote of his old publisher doing something really unethical on the new book, and of having to insist it be recalled while he apologized to a certain famous person.
The famous person wrote him back with words of forgiveness.
His point was that it was wrong to have worried about this blunder, to have recalled the book, and to have written the apology.
I disagree.
While it is, truly, wrong to worry, it also is truly wrong to allow people to walk all over you and to let the mistakes you have allowed to damage others.
A Little Sweat Is Right and Good
The recall was right. The apology was right. The forgiveness was an act of mercy, which I do applaud, but the assessment of the whole ordeal was wrong.
It is right to attempt to undo a wrong. It is right to apologize. It is right to let those who would use you and put you in a bad light know you will not sit down for it.
I don’t know where this author went with the final outcome. I mean, did he use the same publisher, again? I don’t know. Did his relationship with the famous person grow and bloom or wither and die? I don’t know.
But I do know that, aside from the worry, he did the right thing.
And I might have worried a bit, too. Or at least prayed.
Which brings us to college debt forgiveness.
I am thinking I’ve lately read a wonderful solution to this lovely problem.
Folks may be thinking: what problem? There’s a problem? All these kids are getting out from under the huge burdens they were carrying from college. That’s a problem?
Yes.
It’s a problem to any parent who watches a CORRECTLY brought up kid paying down debt, working and going hungry during their college years, in order to make a debt-free life for himself.
It’s a problem when a parent’s coffers are dwindling from having kids in college, while taxes go up to pay for other kids’ college debt and half of them are not even in college.
Yes, it’s too expensive. They knew that going in.
Yes, debt is a heavy burden. They needed to learn that before they got out.
Yes, I think forgiveness is primo.
I just think it’s not about debt, it’s not about the price of college, and it’s not really about forgiveness.
Not about Debt?
You see, there will still be debt. Yep, it’s been passed around to us, who paid our own down, already. We’re all now in debt because today’s youth is stupid. YOU, dear reader, are in debt now, instead of them. Fine solution, I’d say.
Not about the High Cost?
The price of college is not going anywhere, and especially not going anywhere lower. If there is debt forgiveness legislated into our possibilities, then why lower the cost, hmm? Also, one huge factor many refuse to address in this equation is the fact that many families of high school grads did count the cost when they enrolled their children in a college, and then after they were locked in, the cost was raised. A contract was entered, a verbal agreement to a certain price, and then the rug was pulled. That can be so crippling.
Last, but not least, it’s not about forgiveness.
What is forgiveness?
I can start by saying what it is not. It is not saying, “Oh, it’s okay.” It is not okay with me, at all. My money is going to pay for someone else’s flagrancy, with no assurance it will not be repeated soon. I was not even asked and given the opportunity to forgive. I was only notified I’d be the one paying for someone else’s “feelings” of forgiveness. How can that be forgiveness?
Forgiveness is not “excuses”, either. Sure kids are financially ignorant. Sure they need cash to buy their new music, etc., so why save any to spend on school. Sure (Oh, MY!) they didn’t know they’d have to pay it back. Sure they … name your excuse. They couldn’t help it. Sure. I believe that. That is not forgiveness. Is not even a CALL for forgiveness. It’s just a statement of several tiring facts. Facts of life that no one knows are not forgiveness, not a sign of it, even. They’re just a long list of what’s wrong, here.
Forgiveness is not trusting. Hoo, boy, don’t get me started. If trusting is forgiveness, then I’m the one that is being forgiven because we’re all trusting I’ll pay for the crazy. If I will, then I’m the crazy one, I think. But since forgiveness does not include trusting, I TRUST we’ll NOT trust these kids to try again, to accrue more debt again, for them to trust we’ll pay again?
I’d love to help you pay your debts, really I would, but I think they’d rather I be in debt, myself instead. Sorry.
Well I decided to share with you my connection to the lowly peanut, and the butter we make from it.
Forty-five years ago (tomorrow!) I acquired a wonderful, brand new husband. Never looked back. However, it wasn’t long before we were sharing a tad of morning sickness and he had the cure!
It was not something I would have chosen to swallow that morning, not at all. It sounded gross.
But his enthusiasm (plus the fact that he could stand up without fainting and I could not) won the day.
I found myself eyeball to eyeball with a bowl of canned chicken noodle soup and the most amazing combination of foods I could ever imagine in a sandwich.
It was not even a good color combination, and the aromas from it were less than what a newly prego lady would want.
However, it all was served to me while I was still in bed, and with such youthful exuberance, I had to smile to myself at the awesome idea of this young man serving me, his young bride, breakfast in bed with such a hopeful expression, no matter WHAT the menu.
So I sipped on the soup, for starters. (Soup is supposed to be the first course, anyway, I remembered from home ec class.) The soup was fine. He actually knew how to open a can of soup, dilute it properly, and warm it without boiling it over; a factoid worth mental note, indeed.
And he was truly caring and attentive, I also noted, with pleasure.
But the sandwich!
It was time. I had to take at least one bite. How on earth could anyone be so callous as to ignore any part of this loving offering, right?
So I took a bite. I chewed.
The unbelievable flavor combination of white bread, peanut butter, and dill pickle awakened my taste buds to a new world.
Found an amazingly helpful post today at one of the curriculum providers we discuss on this site!
I totally wish we’d known all this about two months ago!
Hope you enjoy!
“Because printing is central to the use of the Robinson Curriculum I know a lot of you have questions as to which printer would be best. The good news is that technology is now delivering the ideal printers at a lower cost than ever before. Someone said that the power of the press is for those who own one – and have something worthwhile to print! Your computer, one of these printers, and the Robinson Curriculum give you that power.”
Ever wonder when would be the best time to begin a new project?
I do that from time to time.
And when we spend a great deal of time deciding when to begin, we are wasting time.
Wouldn’t it help to have a plan for when to begin a project?
Yes it would.
We often do not realize there are three basic types of projects, each with a sensible set of parameters that nearly dictate how to decide when to begin.
First, there is the long-term, self-started, easily interrupted project.
Crocheting an afghan for that wedding scheduled for next spring? Yes, you could begin it any day. It’s so far away, when you begin is not very important.
The best time to begin, if you really want to accomplish this project, is now.
Today. As soon as you finish reading this post.
Realize that beginning such a project includes, first, scheduling its progress. Scheduling means counting the units of the project such as skeins of yarn, and comparing to the time left, such as six months. Does the afghan include 12 skeins of yarn? Then you must complete two skeins every month, one-half skein every week.
Scheduling such a huge project this way accomplishes three objectives:
You will realize you must begin soon.
You will see how easy it will be to finish on time.
You will know, immediately, when you need to stay up past bedtime or work while talking on the phone, thus avoiding putting it all off until it’s too late.
Second, the Help You Promised to Provide
Get roped into making cookies for the next event at church? Promised to present a workshop at the ladies’ retreat? Someone counting on you to . . .
. . . It doesn’t really matter what we place in the blank, here, you have given your word you will do this thing. On time.
Guess when the best time is, to begin.
Now.
Immediately.
This is a matter nearly of life/death importance: It is your word. At least you can find the recipe and make sure you have all the ingredients. At least you can make an outline of the points you hope to present in the workshop, or a list of the visual aids you will need.
When I promise to bring something to somewhere, I often place that thing in my purse or in my car, immediately, before I forget. Then it’s done. If I arrive at the appointed place, it will be there with me. If I am not home when I give my word, I record a note to myself in my “palm pilot”. These notes MUST be dealt with before my next shampoo, or they will be erased. I know that and act accordingly.
Even if I say I will provide the thing next WEEK, it goes into the car NOW (unless it will melt, in which case it goes by the front door, in the way or even hung from the doorknob, obviously outward-bound.) With food items, I post a sticky note on the door at eye level, then another on the steering wheel of the car.
And when you say you will pray for someone, do so in the next breath, especially if you say this in an email. Then it’s done, and the prayer-ee will notice any effects, such as unexplainable peace, immediately, and remember it came from God.
Third, Those Projects You Wish You Could Accomplish
No one really cares if your kitchen is reorganized, but you wish it. Few will notice the grass in your day lilies, but you’d like to get it out of there. No one but you knows how messy your filing system on your laptop is, but it’s driving you slowly and completely crazy.
Begin now, by scheduling a non-negotiable time, each day, to work on it. By non-negotiable, I mean telling the children, “You know Mom has to fix the kitchen (flower bed, computer) right now, every day, so can it wait?” I consider interruptions akin to interrupting a phone call, if I am keeping a promise to myself. Children can even answer the phone for you while you are elbow-deep in kitchen utensils, you know, and you can train them to answer however you want, such as: “Mom is at work, right now. May she call back later? Thanks!”
So: At 10:00 each morning, I will empty one kitchen drawer, get the ick-o out of it, hammer the thing back together better, re-line it with new liner, eliminate the extraneous contents, and reload. It only takes a half hour, or less, and you will not believe how much more you’ll like yourself at 10:30.
OR: At 6:30 each morning, I will pull the grass from the day lilies for ½ hour.
OR: At 10:00 each night, I will get the misfiled folders out of one file and find all the missing things that should be in it.
Then give yourself another such kiss and hug tomorrow, on schedule.
I know, it seems like so much work, it seems so far away, it seems I’d never forget such a promise. However, the truth is that if we decide NOW how to deal with these challenges, we succeed. He who fails to plan, plans to fail.
The birds had better wait to eat here…
Too cold to sit here!
View of the deck through branches of a small maple.
Home's Cool! 