Posted in Blessings of Habit, Brothers, Good ol' days, Health, Homemaking, Inspiring, Who's the mom here?, Wisdom, Wives, Womanhood

I Am Thankful for Thanksgiving Day

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We don’t call it “turkey day”. We don’t even always have turkey.

But I love Thanksgiving Day. What other holiday do we celebrate that is totally intended to be 1.) Christian, and 2.) American?

So very few people actually are at all able to assimilate this truth.

But it is true: The celebration of Thanksgiving Day is a Christian and an American act, no matter who else joins in.

Or doesn’t.

We have always taken it quite seriously, too, often beginning with the five kernels of corn, proceeding to telling what we all are thankful for, and ending with glorious stuff topped with whipped cream, we do the whole thing.

All our kids and grandkids come to be with us that weekend, as opposed to the December holidays, when they run to their other in-laws. They all volunteer to bring food and the dear daughters-in-law have developed quite a repertoire they love to contribute: pumpkin pies, Polly’s Apple Pie!, sweet potato casserole, ham, dressing, whipped potatoes, blueberry pie, and Good Pie, so far.

Our one daughter does whatever needs doing as the day progresses, helping me like a sweet little slave, even helping clean her one remaining unmarried brother’s bedroom before he comes home from college, but her specialty is the banana-bread-bar-none.

Their dad and I contribute turkey, corn, peas, apple gelatin, cranberry sauce, whipped cream, cherry pie, raisin pie, olives, pickles, sausages, and oh, a whole lot more.

They all stay with us, here, in our house or in our guest house, for most of the entire weekend, usually arriving on Wednesday. That night I supply two soups, something venison, and something special. This year it was venison chili, and pumpkin soup, a whim, for me. You see, it is my tradition that I make one “whim” soup.

Another tradition is that my husband goes a little crazy at the grocery and comes home with several $6 bottles of pickled things like jalapeno-stuffed olives or hot vegetable mix. Mmm! The two stoves and three refrigerators stay maxed out.

We have the big meal on Thursday for lunch, at noonish, but we don’t really worry about the clock. We play games like Balderdash and Scattergories, we eat leftovers forever, and we laugh ourselves silly. I’ve noticed the daughters-in-law developing very good relationships with each other and it gives me joy. I love it.

My enemy hates it. I think he hates the show of a whole family being joyful together. I know he hates the act of giving thanks. And, of course, being our enemy, he hates us.

What makes me say all that? Well . . .

I’m trying to think of a single Thanksgiving Day that he did not try to spoil.

  1. One year, back before we had our own grown kids and were still going home to our own parents, we hit a dog and could not make the trip as planned because of a ruined radiator.
  2. Another year, we were rear-ended in rush hour traffic, making us unable to make the trip because the trunk would not open for our luggage.
  3. Another year, we were hit in an intersection by someone who did not know how to drive on ice.
  4. Once, one of our sons broke an arm and needed surgical repair and overnight observation.
  5. Once, one son got diarrhea and was admitted to the hospital for dehydration. And then my husband had a wreck. Same year.
  6. Once, one of my husband’s best friends died and we stayed here for the funeral.
  7. We hit a couple of deer and all the body shops were booked until January.
  8. One time, our fridge conked out. (It was 2 years old.)
  9. Once, I got sick.
  10. Once, my husband and I both got sick.

All these happened on or just before individual Thanksgiving Day weekends. I know once I post this, I will slap my head because I have just remembered the one I forgot.

We get tired of these attacks. Number 10, above, is this year. (2011) I have a fever and a cough as I type this. My head hurts. I did not get to play games with my family, for fear of infecting them with we-know-not-what, since the doctors are closed this weekend.

My wonderful daughters-in-law ran my kitchen like pros and everyone but me had a lovely time.

But I had a lovely time, in a small way. From my bedroom where I quarantined myself for the sake of their health, and because I truly felt like crud, I could hear how wonderfully my family plays and laughs and carries on despite adversity. And from my bedroom, I loved them.

And Thanksgiving Day.

Posted in Believe it or not!, Blessings of Habit, Brothers, Inspiring, Photos

Weekly Photo Challenge: Opportunity – 2

Yep, I’ve decided to go with the second MISSED OPPORTUNITY from yesterday:

Yesterday, I also included a photo of the flag furled in a way that sort of folded itself over itself, and with the sun backlighting it, it made a sort of checkered pattern. I remember I captioned it “Stars and Checks”. Oh well. It was fun while it lasted, but evaporated, funwise and WYSI-wise, the moment I clicked “publish”. Too bad. Now it is just sheer determination that makes me bow to the necessity of posting twice in order to post two photos. Here it is, such a rare moment, for me, a newbie photographer. I was glad for the OPPORTUNITY when I had it and glad to share with those who care to look, now:

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Flag 2

Hope you enjoy the shot.

I did.

Oh, and the link for Part 1 is here. It sort of explains this post. So sorry it has to be this way, evidently.

Posted in Blessings of Habit, Brothers, Inspiring, Photos, Scripture, Wisdom, Womanhood

Been Unfriended?

People can be complicated.

Friendships can be messy.

Knowing more can be scary.

With the knowing, the deeper truths, and the closer expressions of concern, can come the fears, the denials, and the silence.

Been unfriended? Here's what to think, and why it matters!The dark days of friendship.

A couple of friends once asked me if my young teen daughter could arbitrate between their two teens. I could hardly believe my ears. The three of us were close, so I shared my many concerns and said no.

The ramifications were astounding: a seeming total breakdown in all communication.

They literally continued being friends to each other without me and my daughter.

Wow.

A full year later, we were all at an event at a park. One of these friends had a newly-minted, biggest-baddest car-of-the-year and asked me if I would enjoy taking it around the park with her.

The shock!

Still the idea of sitting behind all 4 million horses under that hood was too tempting and we took her for a spin at park speed: 5 mph. Ha.

It was glorious and just destroyed my mini-van, in my eyes.

However, what happened during that drive was more. Far more. This dear friend apologized. She said she was wrong. She had thought I was wrong but she saw differently later. She thanked me for my dedication to truth and to our friendship. I thanked her for the same two things.

We are still friends, the kind that can be apart for a year and then take it up like we were just days apart. Which we did.

This was deep.

This was asking advice on children and giving it.

This was disagreeing and staying cool for a year.

This was trusting an apology would fix it.

This was forgiving wrongs. Deep, deep, deep, like few, few, few friendships ever can be.

The ancients called these types of friendships leb in Hebrew and philos in Greek, implying core understanding, brotherhood. This friend would visit a friend in jail. This friend would give up a year of pleasure for a friend. This friend would help a relative of a friend, if asked; would party and rejoice at a friend’s joy. Read about it in Ruth 2:13 and John 3:29.

But it can backfire.

Big.

All people have at their fingertips the ability to do wrong. This is what we risk in every relationship, but the closer we grow, the more we risk.

The closer we are, the more accurately we can aim our weapons.

And, oh, the more it hurts.

This is a call for caution.

Some people are broken and do not know how to be a friend. Befriending them will always be a lopsided venture, more give than take, like dancing with someone who doesn’t know the steps. Befriending them will always carry risk. Befriending someone who might backfire is a noble calling, not a picnic.

As long as we remember each of us is able to fail, as long as we dedicate ourselves to befriending and not to collecting fun people, we can proceed. We can gently and lovingly share the truth in hope, not that the friendship will one day benefit ME, but that it will one day bring glory to God.

And that is where we all should be.

Comments? Read more?

Posted in Brothers, Inspiring

All My Men Have Been Good to Me – Brothers

I have two brothers. God knows I could not have stood any more. And I don’t mean that in a mean way.

My brothers spoil me. They are extravagantly generous to me. If I had one more brother, I would pop.

First, they endured my obnoxious childhood foibles as a sister. I know they learned their extreme patience from living with me for all those years. If I wasn’t trying to get them to play dress-ups with me, then it was playing school. Which was worse? With me taking charge of everything, it didn’t matter!

Second, they grew up to be strong and loving husbands and dads. They gave me wonderful nieces and a wonderful nephew, and have raised and are raising them right. I rejoice in knowing they all, all, all are my family.

dozen pink roses
One Dozen Pink Roses

Third, they call me, visit me, write me, and bring or send me gifts. Just recently this lovely bouquet arrived at my door. I can hardly believe it. When they visit, the closest one travels about 500 miles. This is devotion, friends. I wish I could grow to deserve it.

But I see similar devotion in my sons, for their sister and it gives me such hope.