Seven Reasons Your Christian Husband Can’t Do Better – Part 2

Mother Scold Son

 Reason #2 – He Has Been Cursed

I’m sticking my neck out, here. Stay with me.

The truth is that our husbands face many draining words in the course of a normal day;

  • Those nagging words you speak: “Why can’t you remember a thing I say?!”
  • Those foretelling words his mother always spoke: “Darling, you know Mother wants you to avoid all the mistakes your father made!”
  • Those fiery words from the boss: “Herman, you just HAVE to shape up!”

All these words can work as curses with bad effects. They cause him to dwell on and believe in his faults, real or imagined, and to take his eyes off the Author and Finisher of his faith. These words tell him he is not good enough and perhaps never will be. He can easily sink into depression or despair instead of standing against the enemy.

 Solution #2: Pray to break word curses spoken over your husband. Try this for a morning prayer: “In the name of the Lord Jesus Christ, I break every curse and negative word spoken over my husband, (name). I declare every curse and negative word spoken over my husband to be broken and null and void in the mighty name of the Lord Jesus Christ. Father, I ask you to put a hedge of protection around my husband’s soul and to guard and protect him from the evil one’s attacks.”

Then stop cursing him. Bless him. We are called to be a blessing, so…be one!

If you had a female roommate, would she stay with you if you talked to her the way you talk to and about your husband? Just because someone is bound to stay with you, by an oath before God, as your husband is, is no reason to take advantage of it and be mean. Tell him how much you appreciate something about him. Tell him you love him, but make it obvious, too.

Do not stop at speaking blessings, be a blessing.

Fix his favorite food, sometimes, just for him, even if it is barely this side of edible. One fried chicken dinner with gravy will go far in saying, “You matter to me,” even if you hope your kids grow up vegetarian. Create a space or two inside his “castle” where things are done his way, where he can feel like he’s at least part owner.

This also goes for when he is not present. Your friends are not being true if they are tempting you in the “roast hubby” game. Look at the Song of Solomon to see how the bride described her groom . . . all the girlfriends wanted to check him out by the time she finished! Your husband isn’t that perfect? Her husband worshiped idols and she likely had no choice in whom she married. How would you like that?

Yet her attitude was godly as ours should be, too.

Maybe you grew up in a matriarchal home.

Maybe you never even considered that your attitude and words could be adding to your problems.

Ask God’s forgiveness. Ask your husband’s forgiveness.

Then walk purely, as a blessing.

Or you cannot expect him to.

All you can expect, then, is bad attitudes in your children, and in your children’s children . . .


Image by xcode via Flickr

Published by Katharine

Katharine is a writer, speaker, women's counselor, and professional mom. Happily married over 50 years to the same gorgeous guy. She loves cooking amazing homegrown food, celebrating grandbabies, her golden-egg-laying hennies, and watching old movies with popcorn. Her writing appears at Medium, Arkansas Women Bloggers, Contently, The Testimony Train, Taste Arkansas, Only in Arkansas, and in several professional magazines and one anthology.

6 thoughts on “Seven Reasons Your Christian Husband Can’t Do Better – Part 2

  1. My mother maintains that grace (the one said before a meal) was invented as, in past-times and during depressions, the food was so scarce and bad that good words would add nourishment to the food, with God’s help. Not sure if this is true but I totally agree with you, Katharine, about the power of words … for good or bad. Watch our words and watch our world – they are a reflection of one another.
    Kia ora

    1. Ah. What a motto: Watch our words and watch our world. Your reply has added to my life with those few words.
      I often wonder so many things about the WORD, about how God could speak things into existence, and even His followers could speak healing into peoples’ lives with nothing but words. And now scientists are saying the DNA code is just words combined with syntax and grammar, like a language. Hmm.
      I know our enemy is listening, too, and loves to jump in wherever our words will open the door even a little.
      Oh, and “grace”, the blessing of and thanksgiving for food before eating it, has a Scriptural basis: 1 Timothy 4:3-5 “They […] order them to abstain from certain foods, which God created to be received with thanksgiving by those who believe and who know the truth. For everything God created is good, and nothing is to be rejected if it is received with thanksgiving, because it is consecrated by the word of God and prayer.” (NIV) So chalk one up for your mother. And mine, too, come to think of it.
      Thanks so much for your comment, here! You have honored me, Philip, and I appreciate your stopping by.

  2. Mom, I’ve just finished reading a book entitled, “Notes from the Tilt-a-Whirl” with a subtitle something like “Thoughts about God’s Spoken World.”
    It read a bit like a stream of consciousness, and there were times when the author, Nathan Wilson, was more esoteric than I could follow…BUT, in his pontifications, he explored quite deeply the Scriptural idea that everything exists because of the Word spoken.
    Quite fascinating stuff, that little book…very colorfully written, poetic at times, and delightfully meandering. If you find yourself staring at an ant or a flower and wondering about their place in this great cosmos of ours, Wilson’s book is perfect for you!

    1. Wow. Sounds like my kind of book. The scientific FACT that all life is composed of words is so hidden in the science world. They know the implications and few people are willing to risk all to spread the truth, right? That truth, hidden for so long, was right before our eyes since “In the beginning.was the Word . . . ” Thanks for this recommendation. I think I will enjoy it, and I think I will definitley do what it takes to find and read it. 🙂

  3. to be a blessing to our husbands is a constant calling. By being a blessing to him I then can gain the strength to be a blessing to others as well. Scripture gives us the strength, knowledge, and wisdom to continue to be a blessing. Our husbands are calling upon us to do precisely that.

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