Posted in Believe it or not!, Inspiring, Who's the mom here?, Wisdom, Wives, Womanhood

The Boundary Around My Pond

Another view of the pond
Another view of the icy pond

Boundaries are wonderful. Without them we could not have ponds. No ponds, no fish. Yes, we like boundaries. I think the fish do, too.

One boundary we think we don’t welcome is the womb. Wombs are wonderful. Without them we could not have babies. I think the babies like them, too.

But we ignore what we know is true and we violate that quiet, safe place for our growing babies, every day. Over 3000 times per day. It is impossible to violate our own bodies and our children’s lives the way we do, and still feel human.

Look at this:

In Pennsylvania, they’ve found a physician/abortionist who has made a profession and a large fortune from violating the boundaries of our wombs. How did he do it? By accepting payment in cash, not reporting his earnings, storing his money at home instead of in a bank, not disposing of bio-hazards, not sterilizing equipment, not providing gowns for patients, and barely paying staff.

Oh, and he sold drugs on the side. Cash, only, please.

More than half the people who went into his “clinic” died. You know, all the babies died, and several of the moms, too. It was just like the good ol’ days, minus the coat hanger. “Safe and rare”, my foot.

The only good thing about it, if it can be called good, is the wording the Philadelphia reporter, Stephanie Farr, used as she wrote her detailed report about Dr. Gosnell’s goings on:

“How many severed baby spines does it take to pay for a $984,000 shore house? How many severed infant feet is a boat worth?”

I am glad she said it that way. I don’t know how she had the nerve to write this truth in such big newspaper, nor how she got by with it, but there it was, on the Internet, for all to see. For all to think about. For all to try to grasp.

Not only does abortion mistreat women; it mistreats babies, violates wombs, ignores boundaries.

And it can turn us into monsters.

Posted in Blessings of Habit, Husbands, Inspiring, Wisdom, Wives

Why not Date?

Classic "one-knee" proposal, ca. 1815
Classic “one-knee” proposal, ca. 1815 (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Why not Date?

Of course, God must have had some reason for causing us to be male and female, yet also programming us to hesitate, to want to do it right, to hate divorce just as He does. What gives?

God set up the whole marriage relationship as a picture, a sort of parable, of perfection in relationship. You have to admit, when male/female relationships are going right, it can be heavenly, right? And when it all goes south, well . . .

Facts are, God is all about loving relationship. He says He IS love. He is a relationship. Love is everything. Love is all you need. And almost every problem on earth is a relationship problem.

Marriage is so important to God. He set up everything in His kingdom with the idea in mind of it being like a marriage. (Or maybe marriage is like His kingdom?) In fact, in all of His creation, out of all the things He created, there was only one thing He said was not good: That man should be alone, single. Man could never picture Heavenly things if He had no counterpart, no one to love, no one to become one with and be fruitful with.

But what is dating? Is it a loving thing? Or is it using someone just to have a good time? Or is it pretending to be married? Are we fools?

The Bible speaks of only two types of relationships between unmarried, non-familial men and women. One is betrothal. The other is over-anxious, questionable men hanging around loose women.

Guess which one we practice these days?

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Posted in Blessings of Habit, Husbands, Inspiring, Pre-schoolers, Wisdom, Wives

About Dating

Humans have been practicing dating on a large scale for around, 50 to 75 years. Before that, no one dated. Some snuck out, but that was sneaking out; it wasn’t dating.

The very idea of two unmarried people spending any time together, alone, was unthinkable to most people, once upon a time.

Why? At least for three reasons.

  1. Of course, the obvious reason most people think of is the unwed pregnancy, illegitimate child, and ensuing ruined lives. It may be hard for some to believe, but when parents and legislators guarded a young woman so closely back then, it was for her benefit as much as anything.
  2. Political reasons also factored in; not national politics like we think of these days, but human politics of the family, the estate, the wills, etc. Marriage strengthens families, and thereby, communities, cities, and countries. The foolishness displayed through the ins and outs of the dating mess weakens us all. People and families who desire to get somewhere choose marriage and its strengths, not foolishness.
  3. Religion forbade it. We cannot really blame Christianity because all religions have strict rules requiring single-mindedness about marriage and deterring the weakness inherent in youthful foolishness. Even someone who would boast of being the most irreligious, and who had a “special friend”, would call it cheating if that friend stepped out on him. That’s because the whole idea is universal.

And there was a time, not so long ago, when all people heeded this universal idea, whether they liked it or not. While there always have been a few out-of-wedlock babies, they were few, just enough to soften the blow of infertility for other people. And people hid the trouble as much as possible. And they were regretful.

Why is marriage universal?

A better question might be, why did God build this program into all people? It is because His Son is a Bridegroom, waiting for a pure bride.

Posted in Inspiring, Wisdom, Wives, Womanhood

An Anatomy of Pain

sad woman lying down

This is not about physical pain, although all women, and especially all wives, are great experts at physical pain. After having 6 children and around 2000 migraines, I certainly am.

But this is about the pain that attacks your soul, the confusion, indecision, and heartbreaks that can blindside us all.

Like when the doctor tells you morning sickness is all in your head.

Let’s just face it: The happenings in life are often unfair. We devote a third of our government to being sure life is fair, but unfairness still slips in, doesn’t it? A lot, right? It’s not enough that a child dies, but it sometimes must be that someone killed him. It’s not enough that a woman loses her husband, but sometimes it must be that some other woman stole him. It’s not enough that a house burns down, but sometimes it must be that an arsonist started a forest fire.

Isn’t that how it goes?

And it hurts most when friends and family are the perpetrators, doesn’t it? When your child is ungrateful, it hurts more. When your husband is lazy, it hurts more. When someone at church lies about you, it hurts more.  When your mother gets on your case, it hurts more.

Sometimes that’s just how it goes.

And sometimes, even that is not enough. Sometimes we also must go through these hurts alone. Having no defenders makes it tougher. Having no one to confide in intensifies it. Having no one just hurts. More.

Since I’ve been experiencing considerable pain, lately, I thought talking to you would help me keep my brain right-side up. Oh, I’ll share no real details, but generalities should be enough to help you help me help you. What about it?

Wouldn’t it be a good thing if we could turn our hurts into help for others?

I’m in. Let’s take a week to do an autopsy on mental and emotional pain. Let’s take every part out and learn what goes wrong and how to right it.

Maybe you know someone else you could share this with. Or send it to.

Maybe we all can feel better, think straighter, laugh more.

More tomorrow.

Posted in Homemaking, Inspiring, Recipes, Wives

Yum-yummmm

⭐ Caramelized Onions and Green Beans
2 Tablespoons real butter
1/4 cup sliced almonds (opt.)
5 green onions
1 clove garlic, pressed
1 large bunch green beans
1 bell or jalapeño pepper (opt.)

Clean onions and cut into long halves or quarters. Stem and rinse beans. Brown almonds, if desired, in butter, in a good fry pan, then remove from pan and set aside.Throw rest of ingredients into pan. Begin on high heat, but turn to low before it burns. Cover. Stir often. When beans wrinkle some, it probably is done. Test for tenderness of carrots. Add salt and fresh pepper, if desired. We love it!
I’ve also been known to add summer squash, cauliflower, and/or carrots to this dish. Just cook it all until you are afraid it might burn, then pour into serving dish before it does!

⭐ The Secret to My Meat Salad
2 cups ground, cooked meat, such as roast or turkey
1 chopped egg
½ cup chopped celery
½ cup chopped apple, skin on
½ cup pickle, dill or sweet
¼ cup real mayonnaise
1 tablespoon mustard
few drops liquid smoke

Stir all together well. May need more mayonnaise.

⭐ Brined Chicken
Thaw chicken meat in 1 gallon warm water with 1 cup salt added. Rinse. Prepare as usual for your recipe; taste before you salt. You will appreciate the difference. 

⭐ Homemade Kosher Dill Pickle
Bring to a boil:
3 quarts water
1 quart real cider vinegar (5% acidity!)
1 cup plain salt

Heat lids according to package instructions. Tightly pack small cucumbers into clean jars. To each jar add 1 clove garlic, 1 cayenne pepper, and 1 teaspoon dill seed. Pour boiling brine into jars to ½ inch below rim. Wipe rim. Apply lid and screw band. May at this point use hot water bath for 15 minutes.

More tomorrow!

Posted in Blessings of Habit, Good ol' days, Home School, Homemaking, Inspiring, Recipes, Wisdom, Wives

My Favorite Tips

Save Trips to the Store and Save Money

I cannot overemphasize how we wives need to stick together and help each other.

Candle in the window
Candle in the window (Photo credit: Paul Bowman)

Used to be, home schoolers were odd because they homeschooled.

Now days, it’s just rare to find a mom at home, at all. Like it or not, we live in what amounts to the wilderness days, when women kept homemade candles glowing in windows just to cheer each other at night. How kind we used to be, reminding each other, when the coyotes were howling, that someone else was braving it through that lonely existence, too!

The duty of visiting each other and showing hospitality actually had meaning and value, then. Nowadays, we cannot justify visiting unless someone is homebound. Isn’t that us? How else can we keep home, unless we are home? So here I come, through the wilderness, visiting you with news of tips I’ve learned along the way.

It beats gossip.

Out of laundry detergent? Use about 1/8 cup hand-dishwashing liquid in a full load of laundry. This cleans well, but is not quite as easy on clothing as laundry detergent, so do buy the right stuff when you get the chance. It’s great, though, for those days when all the jeans are muddy and you’re out of detergent. Do not use with bleach, however.

For cleaner clothes and less wear on the washer and use of electricity, wash with the lid open (top loaders, only!) on a shorter, gentler cycle. After it agitates, it will soak. Later, re-run the agitation cycle for a few moments with the lid closed. The cycle will complete as usual and the new level of clean will surprise you.

Rather than waste money on aerosol cans of starch, try starching in the washer. Place all starch items together, for this short time, unless they are terrible bleeders. (Do not put your husband’s white shirts with your new red doily, etc.) Fill with warm water, less than usual for that size load. For medium water level, prepare starch thus: Bring one quart water to boil. Thoroughly stir ½ cup cornstarch into 2 cups cold water. Slowly pour this into the boiling water, whisking constantly. Remove from heat. Pour into washer and agitate on gentle cycle. Drain and spin on gentle cycle that does not add much water to the spin. The idea is to eliminate dripping and still leave a goodly amount of starch in the clothing. Drip dry—no dryer, please. Iron using steam and a spray bottle of water to dampen as you go. Starch makes important clothing nice and crisp. I absolutely love what it does for rayon. Sometimes starched clothing fares so well, it is wearable for two days. Collars and yokes pick up less body oil, too, if starched.

Baking soda really does almost anything. I hate to sound like our favorite matron of homemaking, but just try some, in a paste, on your toaster, to see. I even clean ovens with it. I used to think this advice was too hoaky, but it’s for real. Baking soda works just like scouring powder, but is gentler on the item you clean and tougher, if possible, on grunge. I was so shocked when I first learned this. I used to think, “Yeah. Right!” But no more.

To remove permanent ink try hair spray. Rub and launder. If it doesn’t work, hardly anything else will. To remove wax from fabric try ammonia. Get the worst out first, with heating or scraping. It may take a while, but it will dissolve.

More tomorrow. 🙂

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Posted in Homemaking, Inspiring, Recipes, Wives

Recipes and Tips Week, as Promised – Here are some of my favorite secrets. Enjoy!

All the whole wheat goodness

Homemade Self-rising Whole Wheat Flour
10 cups whole wheat flour
5 teaspoons salt
5 Tablespoons double-acting baking powder

Sift together three times. Store very tightly covered. Substitute for self-rising flour.

This really works and adds fiber to your diet. Great for pancakes, biscuits, anything you usually make with self-rising flour. So handy!

Sometimes, you may notice a slight difference in consistency. This comes from the fiber in the whole wheat. You may use a bit more if you feel your batter or dough is too soft or runny. Or add regular whole wheat flour to make consistency you expected. You can do this. It’s how new recipes come about.

Emergency Homemade “Cake Flour”
Place 2 tablespoons cornstarch into one-cup measure. Lightly add enough flour to fill cup. Sift together, well. Substitute for 1 cup cake flour. To make in advance for general use:

1 cup cornstarch
7 cups flour

Sift together three times. Store tightly covered. Makes eight cups “cake flour”.

Emergency Frosting without Powdered Sugar
5 Tablespoons flour
1 cup milk
1 cup (2 sticks) soft butter
1 teaspoon salt
1 cup sugar
2 teaspoons vanilla

Whisk together flour and milk. Slowly cook, stirring constantly, until it boils and is very thick. Refrigerate until completely cooled.

Whip rest of ingredients in large mixer bowl until fluffy. Gradually add flour mixture and beat until fluffy, the longer, the better. May add 2 T. cocoa with 1 t. milk to first flour mixture, if desired. Enough for two-layer cake. Store refrigerated.

Tomorrow will be savings tips. See ya!