Posted in Believe it or not!, Blessings of Habit, Husbands, Inspiring, Photos, Scripture, Wisdom, Wives

Seven Reasons Your Christian Husband Can’t Do Better – Part 2

Mother Scold Son

 Reason #2 – He Has Been Cursed

I’m sticking my neck out, here. Stay with me.

The truth is that our husbands face many draining words in the course of a normal day;

  • Those nagging words you speak: “Why can’t you remember a thing I say?!”
  • Those foretelling words his mother always spoke: “Darling, you know Mother wants you to avoid all the mistakes your father made!”
  • Those fiery words from the boss: “Herman, you just HAVE to shape up!”

All these words can work as curses with bad effects. They cause him to dwell on and believe in his faults, real or imagined, and to take his eyes off the Author and Finisher of his faith. These words tell him he is not good enough and perhaps never will be. He can easily sink into depression or despair instead of standing against the enemy.

 Solution #2: Pray to break word curses spoken over your husband. Try this for a morning prayer: “In the name of the Lord Jesus Christ, I break every curse and negative word spoken over my husband, (name). I declare every curse and negative word spoken over my husband to be broken and null and void in the mighty name of the Lord Jesus Christ. Father, I ask you to put a hedge of protection around my husband’s soul and to guard and protect him from the evil one’s attacks.”

Then stop cursing him. Bless him. We are called to be a blessing, so…be one!

If you had a female roommate, would she stay with you if you talked to her the way you talk to and about your husband? Just because someone is bound to stay with you, by an oath before God, as your husband is, is no reason to take advantage of it and be mean. Tell him how much you appreciate something about him. Tell him you love him, but make it obvious, too.

Do not stop at speaking blessings, be a blessing.

Fix his favorite food, sometimes, just for him, even if it is barely this side of edible. One fried chicken dinner with gravy will go far in saying, “You matter to me,” even if you hope your kids grow up vegetarian. Create a space or two inside his “castle” where things are done his way, where he can feel like he’s at least part owner.

This also goes for when he is not present. Your friends are not being true if they are tempting you in the “roast hubby” game. Look at the Song of Solomon to see how the bride described her groom . . . all the girlfriends wanted to check him out by the time she finished! Your husband isn’t that perfect? Her husband worshiped idols and she likely had no choice in whom she married. How would you like that?

Yet her attitude was godly as ours should be, too.

Maybe you grew up in a matriarchal home.

Maybe you never even considered that your attitude and words could be adding to your problems.

Ask God’s forgiveness. Ask your husband’s forgiveness.

Then walk purely, as a blessing.

Or you cannot expect him to.

All you can expect, then, is bad attitudes in your children, and in your children’s children . . .

__________________

Image by xcode via Flickr

Posted in Believe it or not!, Husbands, Inspiring, Photos, Scripture, Wisdom, Wives

Seven Reasons Your Christian Husband Can’t Do Better – Part 1

Sad Man

I’ve caught a bit of a cold and thought I’d take a break by re-posting a series from about a year ago. It is loaned to me from a friend who first published it in a now out-of-print magazine. Hope you enjoy it.

A man is supposed to be a container for the essence of God. He is supposed to be beautiful in his calling to contain the Almighty. There is nothing sadder than an emotionally broken, bruised, wounded, torn, scarred, weak, limping man. It should break your heart and make you cry every time you hear of one.

It breaks Jesus’ heart.

Your husband’s childhood already did enough to hurt your man. It’s time to give him a break. For God’s sake, love him. Give him space to heal.

And take it easy on your sons.

Reason Number 1

 He Is not Saved

I know, I know; we said he’s a Christian. He says he’s a Christian. Everybody, especially you, hopes he’s a Christian, but what IS a Christian?

Is it someone who claims to be a Christian?

The Word promises nothing to people who merely claim to be Christian.

All the promises of God are for those who admit sin, repent, are born again, love and obey God, love the brethren, have the Spirit of Christ Jesus in them, etc. If he is not walking by the Spirit, maybe he is not Spiritual, not born again.

Maybe, unknowingly, he is an impostor.

Solution #1 Pray him into the kingdom. Forgive him.

Stop expecting him to be able to achieve Godliness. Forgive him.

Be scrupulously careful about always submitting to him. Forgive him.

Love him for who he was meant to be. Forgive him.

Hurt with him in his lost misery. Forgive him.

Stop taking his actions so personally. Forgive him.

Beg God for grace in this time of need to minister unto him. Forgive him.

Smile more. Forgive him.

Cry out to God. Fast. Wait upon the Lord.

Be sure not to mistake occasional lapses for lostness. Most people sin. You sin. I sin.

Be sure you are more concerned with his soul than with your reputation. What will your friends think if you have an unsaved husband? Better ask what God will think if you never solicit prayer on your husband’s behalf! Make sure someone is praying for him (not for you/about him.) It will not dishonor him to tell the truth about his lost soul to sisters who are older and are true prayer warriors. Pray down the only help there is for the lost and undone.

Do not think about self in this problem. Pray constantly. Pray for him when you fold his socks, when you pack his lunch, when you wash out his bathtub. Face the truth with the joy that comes from knowing that half the work is done when we see what to do.

Have you always wished you could go to the mission field?

Maybe you are there.

Do not let your disappointment about your marriage cause you to treat your husband with any less respect or joy than you would give to the heathen in some far off country.

However you arrived in the situation within which you find yourself, remember: God saw and knew all the things you didn’t. Stop now, and re-assess your life and its meaning before God. Be kind to the provider that God has provided for you.

Never forget that your service to your husband is to be as unto the Lord. Strive to make him as happy and pleased as you can. Who else, but a wonderful Christian like you, can truly serve and comfort anyone, anyway? Serve. Be a comfort. Win him with kindness and forgiveness.

Take hope.

Be strong and courageous.

Do not fear.

God is with you.

*Image by mrhayata via Flickr

Posted in Blessings of Habit, Health, Inspiring, Who's the mom here?, Wisdom

What to Do if You Are Under a Manipulator – Part 1

If you and a manipulative person are thrown in together in a way where you cannot escape, what can you do?

  1. First, realize this does not apply to your God-ordained authorities. This means your pastor, husband, parents (if you are young and single), boss, police, mayor, judges, etc. These people are supposed to have some say in your life and you should do what they say if it is not illegal.
  2. Be careful of receiving gifts, compliments, invitations, etc., especially if they have implied debts attached to them (strings attached). You may feel that God wants you to accept the item, but always remember that anything given to you is yours to do with or about as you see fit. A gift is not a contract. If you did not say you would reciprocate with a certain favor because of what you have received, you are not bound to do so when such favors are brought up after the fact.
  3. Seek God daily about your daily activities. Make God your daily planner, not the person who is trying to be God.
  4. Plan ahead. Decide before the telephone rings how long you need to spend on the telephone today. Decide before you receive an invitation for dinner whether or not you are available to go out. Decide before the next time the person is trying to cry, just exactly what your response should be, then . . .
  5. Do not back down! Make “no” mean NO. you can be very polite and still say “no” and make it stick. Do not worry about what the person will think; these people are not responsible for their thoughts and their thoughts are mostly irrational and unpredictable, anyway. No matter what you do, you will invoke base thought from a manipulator.
  6. Be merciless with the sin of control; love the sinner. You can be very distant from a person for his own good, out of love for the person. You could deny an alcoholic liquor because you loved him, right? This time, you are the addictive substance that is being consumed to the point of abuse. Someone has to stop it.
  7. Don’t major on minors. Allow a little control, if you see that it doesn’t matter, especially at first. Let the person choose your ice cream, parking spot, whatever will soften the initial blow of weaning. Save your insistence for choosing friends, movies, books, etc. Also, if the controller lies about the laundry, for instance, let it go, but if lies about your children pop up, expose them.

Hope this is beginning to make sense. More coming tomorrow!

Posted in Inspiring, Scripture, Wisdom

Sunday Scriptures – Textured

Comfort, comfort my people, says your God.

Speak tenderly to Jerusalem, and proclaim to her that her hard service has been completed, that her sin has been paid for, that she has received from the Lord’s hand double for all her sins.

A voice of one calling: In the desert prepare the way for the Lord; make straight in the wilderness a highway for our God.

Every valley shall be raised up, every mountain and hill made low; the rough ground shall become level, the rugged places a plain.

And the glory of the Lord will be revealed, and all mankind together will see it. For the mouth of the Lord has spoken.”                      –Isaiah 40:1-5

Posted in Good ol' days, Herbs, Homemaking, Photos

Oooh-La-Lavender!

The Fun Part

lavender, lace, etc.
Lavender, Lace, Etc.

How I love preparing for a big project! I think being prepared is one of my favorite pastimes. Of course, it doesn’t hurt a bit that I found most of this grand collection of fabrics for free or at most, $1 per yard at garages sales. Wow.

Not only that, but most of it was neatly folded, just as you see here, and to top that off, clean and tightly-packed in zipper-type bags, smelling of newness and all things nice. Ha! So much fun to find all this lavender-ness standing in line, jumping up and down, crying, “Pick ME! Pick ME!”

Add to that the obvious, my huge collection of actual lavender blossoms, themselves, which you may view here, and you can see I am right on ready.

I am pretty good at staying ready. I am not always so sure for what. How about you?

This time, though, I am sure. I must make as many lavender things as I can, to attempt some sales at a festival in a couple of weeks. So, you might as well ready yourself for lots of purple posts. Ha.

Probably won’t sell much, but these things always make great gifts, and for any birthday, etc., that happens along, I will be . . .

. . . READY!

Posted in Inspiring, Scripture, Wisdom

Sunday Scriptures: Red

In honor of the 400th anniversary of the translation of the Bible into English, commissioned by King James of England in 1611, and originally published by Robert Barker, printer to the King, I will use this version for the rest of this year in these posts. Editing sure has changed since then! Hope we can enjoy the quaint differences we find here and appreciate all that went into it.

Come now and let vs reason together, saith the Lord: though your sinnes be as scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; though they be red like crimsin, they shall be as wooll.
If yee be willing and obedient, yee shall eate the good of the land.
But if yee refuse and rebell, yee shal be deuoured with the sword: for the mouth of the Lord hath spoken it.

Isaiah 1:18-20