relationships – Page 26

A Rosy Posy

Posted on April 1, 2011March 31, 2011 by Katharine

About a month ago, someone plowed our garden spot. Then he tilled it. Then he harrowed it. Then he marked it into rows. Then he planted and planted and planted. Onions, cabbages, corn, tomatoes, all are out there. Everything is growing. The corn is two inches tall. Last night, I got this gorgeous posy:

It is more than just a clump of radishes.

It is saving and scrimping to buy land.
It is buying and maintaining a tractor.
It is watching weather and planning ahead for planting.
It is keeping a vegetable inventory, to know how much to plant each year.
It is changing diet to fit what grows in our area.
It is walking out to the garden every day to be sure things are okay.
It is stringing irrigation hoses out there and paying for water when the rain refuses to fall.
It is seeding it over in autumn with crimson clover so we either get a cover crop or else some venison.
It is buying and maintaining a small tiller for between rows, later.
It is researching through gardening books for help with pests and diseases.
It is sharpening and oiling the hoe, shovel, and rake.
It is pulling rocks out and chunking them into the ditch.
It is winding twine round and round and round stakes to support plants.
It is shredding piles and piles of newspapers for mulch.
It is staying up late and going out with a dorky “headlight cap” on and covering tender plants before a surprise frost comes.

All of the above, and more, go into the first bouquet of the vegetable gardening season. And here it is, held in the hand that provided it, the hand of someone who, though he doesn’t eat many radishes, knows who does.

radish bouquet — First Bouquet of the Vegetable Season

Believe it or not!, Husbands, Inspiring, Wisdom, Wives

All My Men Have Been Good to Me – Husband

Posted on March 28, 2011March 27, 2011 by Katharine

They hoped he wouldn’t love me, but he did. They predicted we wouldn’t last, but we did. Vietnam tried to separate us, but it didn’t. They said we’d never get anywhere, but we did.

And at least half of it was due to the only man who would give up his seat to me, forty-something years ago.

We were hardly more than children, but love and stubbornness led the way. Milestone after milestone whizzed by until it seemed there was no stopping us.

Bumps in the road gave us strength, new direction, and adaptability, a great combination.

Now, six children homeschooled and raised up and out of the home, mostly it’s just us. And that was really all I needed in the first place—all the rest was frosting.

Buying and selling houses and cars, fixing broken things, building what we lacked, sweating at laboring, always taking the frugal route, he provided, always provided, so I would not have to leave our nest, was free to tend our babes in peace, not harried. I love the life I acquired with this man who spent himself so willingly for my freedom.

Then there is the wisdom. They say still waters run deep, and for him, it is true. When he spoke, the words were worth listening. When he spoke, other women feared.

And patience. Married to a woman who “needs a mute button”, he always listened, always listens. Always knows the answers to my confusions,

Let the world belittle marriage and commitment! Let them rant against fidelity and sanctity! Let them screw their brows into frowns and suspicions! Let them pretend they are happy without loyalty and truthfulness! Let them blow!

I cannot hear it.

I have spent my whole life with my best friend and would that I had another life to do it all again.

Brothers, Inspiring

All My Men Have Been Good to Me – Brothers

Posted on March 25, 2011December 16, 2014 by Katharine

I have two brothers. God knows I could not have stood any more. And I don’t mean that in a mean way.

My brothers spoil me. They are extravagantly generous to me. If I had one more brother, I would pop.

First, they endured my obnoxious childhood foibles as a sister. I know they learned their extreme patience from living with me for all those years. If I wasn’t trying to get them to play dress-ups with me, then it was playing school. Which was worse? With me taking charge of everything, it didn’t matter!

Second, they grew up to be strong and loving husbands and dads. They gave me wonderful nieces and a wonderful nephew, and have raised and are raising them right. I rejoice in knowing they all, all, all are my family.

Third, they call me, visit me, write me, and bring or send me gifts. Just recently this lovely bouquet arrived at my door. I can hardly believe it. When they visit, the closest one travels about 500 miles. This is devotion, friends. I wish I could grow to deserve it.

But I see similar devotion in my sons, for their sister and it gives me such hope.

Blessings of Habit, Good ol' days, Inspiring, Wisdom

An Odd Egg

Posted on March 21, 2011February 22, 2017 by Katharine

What a difference in these two eggs! Each appeared during this flip-flop season we call “spring”.

Spring is such a time of turmoil in our area—flower and leaf buds popping out everywhere, new birth, chickens beginning the new laying season, tornadoes—I wonder how we survive it.

Spring’s natural beauty forces us to love her. The amazing fragrances and forms of blooming things, the pearlescence of eggshells and the fragility of baby chicks, the mew of kittens, the peeping of hidden frogs, all work on us, draw us to that perennial love affair with spring.

So we roll up our sleeves, kick off our shoes, and pull our hair up into ponytails to catch the sun on our skin. We pull weeds, freshen flags, mow too soon, plant too soon—anything to be outdoors, to come inside smelling like spring. We paint lawn furniture, divide potted plants, and attend herbal festivals, filling our lives with projects to prepare us for spring.

But no-yolk and double-yolk eggs most remind me of spring. My dad had a collection of odd eggshells that appeared on the same day as tornadoes. He always said the tornado scared the hens and caused them to lay odd eggs. I think he believed that. Maybe it is true. He labeled each shell with the date of its corresponding tornado and displayed them on egg cups, for which they were far too large or far too small. He always loved curiously humorous events.

He’s been gone, now, about 12 years. So much has changed. I doubt he ever guessed I’d be telling the whole world about his eggshell collection, one day. I doubt he ever guessed what an impact he had, in the daily humor of life.

But I do not doubt he lived life, squeezed everything he could out of it, love it, with one hand held palm-upward, trusting, waiting for some blessing to fall into it, be it only an odd eggshell.

And he was not disappointed.

Inspiring, Scripture, Womanhood

Sunday Scriptures – Spring

Posted on March 20, 2011March 19, 2011 by Katharine

Listen! My lover!
Look! Here he comes,
leaping across the mountains,
bounding over the hills.
My lover is like a gazelle or young stag.
Look! There he stands behind our wall,
gazing through the windows,
peering through the lattice.
My lover spoke and said to me, “Arise, my darling,
my beautiful one, and come with me.
See! The winter is past;
the rains are over and gone.
Flowers appear on the earth;
the season of singing has come,
the cooing of doves
is heard in our land.
The fig tree forms its early fruit;
the blossoming vines spread their fragrance.
Arise, come, my darling;
my beautiful one, come with me.”

– Song of Songs 2:8-13

On another note: Friends, please pray for my son who is in a position of having to fly to Shanghai this Monday, via California, over Japan. Thanks.

Home School, Inspiring, Pre-schoolers, Who's the mom here?, Wisdom

Why Do People Put Their Children in Schools? Part – 2 – The Solution

Posted on March 18, 2011December 31, 2015 by Katharine

Reasons for being at home Children need to be in homes.

Arresting thought, isn’t it.

If there exists any type of divine design, then for argument’s sake, we must think that children were put into homes for a reason.

But even those who cannot swallow the idea of a God must consider why all creatures seem to have evolved to higher and higher plains while passing through a home- or family-type stage, and the higher the plain, the longer the prerequisite familial stage, with homo-sapiens needing a family for the longest time of all.

It is worth a thought.

Many who have given it a thought have withdrawn their children from the bedlam outside the home. Then—surprise!—their children begin auto-correcting their psyches, learning more, retaining more, doing more with it, and growing up to be more productive.

I am not making this up. It is heavily-researched scientific fact that no thinking person should ignore, especially if that person cares about children, about the state of his country, or about the future at all.

And before we continue, we must define a home: a set of parents who function adequately, with each other and with their children, as mom and dad. To use a broken, dysfunctional, or abusive home as a reason for schools is as fair as using a broken, dysfunctional, or abusive school as a reason for home schools.

But bad schools are not the reason to homeschool.

CHILDREN are the reason to homeschool.

If you have them, you should.

Today’s children are being destroyed in schools. They were not made to be in schools and do not thrive there. They are tormented daily, growing warped personalities we see depicted in the worst national headlines.

And they’re not allowed to pray

Putting children into a school is asking them to pass the socializing test before ever receiving any instruction, correction,or reinforcements about HOW to socialize. They encounter children even less trained than they are, with no chance of escape from this zoo.

Sink-or-swim is often a great way to drown a kid.

The typical classroom is sink-or-swim. When drowning, it is natural for the inexperienced to attempt survival by pushing down on other swimmers.

Just natural.

Empathy is the natural product of a home education. Each older child who cherishes the home’s newest infant later has patience with that same child doing wrong, cares if that sibling falls down, laughs with—not at—that little one.

Resilience is another natural product of a home education. Encouraging, even requiring social resilience, leads to practice in resilience. The old “get back on the horse” motto prevails and in time, becomes instilled. As the child matures, he develops the ability to keep going, no matter what, if only someone has taught him how.

Confidence is another natural product of a home education, and it is born of hope. A child who is dumped at the door of an antagonistic, institutionalized experience has no hope. A child who has a mommy who will keep everyone on a good social plane while they learn, just because she loves them, has hope and learns confidence.

Tomorrow, part 3 about how to fix the schools. See ya’!

Good ol' days, Pre-schoolers, Who's the mom here?, Wisdom

Why do people put children in schools? Part 1

Posted on March 17, 2011December 15, 2015 by Katharine

Tired and angry child.

People forget children are not adults. Adults can handle many things children cannot. The adult thinks to himself, “Oh, it won’t be that bad.” But he forgets. Time has a way of rewriting our memories.

We project ourselves onto our children and think of how great it would be to be surrounded with 25 five-year-olds every day for nine months. We think as an adult who has authority and could quell any problem with a child. We forget a child has no such ability and does not even know what to do, let alone how.

Or we look at other kids or our own childhood and think, “They did okay. I did okay. Troubles make you stronger, after all.” That is true to an extent. When air blows over a plant, it does make it stronger, unless it is a tornado.

If we look deeper, though, we realize those who did well in school were taught how, as were most of their peers. In my day, kids were polite. It was considered a huge breach of civilized behavior to forget to say “please.” The child who did this was ostracized. Now it is a joke. It is a different world. It is truly bad.

Bad has always been a possibility, though, in schools. Some were blown away by the tornadoes of troubles they faced. Einstein, Edison, Disraeli, and T. Roosevelt all did poorly in the institutions of their days—very poorly.

If we actually were to place ourselves in our children’s shoes, we would think twice, and that would be good.

Think: if everyone at your workplace were mean to you, had better stuff than you, outperformed you, or got chosen before you.

How well could you cope with that?

Would you change jobs?

They say in those circumstances, a person should change jobs. However, children in those circumstances cannot change jobs. Their job must always remain to go to the school of someone else’s determining. Period.

If you did stay in that job, though, would you seek comfort from family or friends? Sure you would, and you should!

The child, though, often finds his family does not believe how bad it is, as discussed above, or does not understand the enormity of it. And his friends! They are all at the school, all in the same boat! How can they help? The child and all his friends are in a social drain that leaves them socially depleted by day’s end. And then he usually has more school to do at home.

You know how you would resent having to bring work home. Daily. Hours and hours of it.

Yet, you have freedom to leave your job if you want, even to take vacation whenever you want. The child is required by law to remain in his torture chamber for 12 years, at least. No wonder they think of suicide.

We will discuss the solution to this ongoing problem tomorrow. See ya!