Never.
Ever.
Say this where I can hear it.
Nor type it where I can read it.
Or you will be corrected.
By me.
All women work.
Do not chuckle condescendingly and say, “It’s just a way of speaking.”
Lying is a way of speaking, and we correct it.
It is a way of thinking. No, actually, it is a symptom of not thinking.
Or, may I stay at home and not work?
Heh heh, it’s just a way of speaking. Heh heh.
Oh. Have a little headache?
Between the eyes?
So sorry. In a way of speaking.
Heh heh.
We have a lot of dead trees after last summer’s drought and have been marking them for a sale. Since I was keeping the tally while someone else did all the work, I could spend time looking around. I have seen a LOT of trees.
Some of these poor things are real troopers and remind me of myself and some of my friends. They have been wounded down near their bases by ice storms, insects, buck deer, and other invaders of their quiet domain. I wonder if I am imagining things here, or if others can see themselves in these trees, too.
This first type is the sheltering type:
This tree will never make fine furniture grade. It is a humble, struggling entity, but has a spot to share with any other humble, struggling entity. Can’t you imagine a wee mouse family finding comfort here?
Here is another. Don’t you love the way this tree, though obviously dealt a heavy blow in early life, has risen to the occasion by developing an upward-reaching lifestyle in non-standard ways? It ‘s almost like a life motto: Always reach up!
And because of their flaws, they will never be part of a paladian palace. They may not even possess health enough to live as long as other trees.
But they do make a grand shelter from a snowy wind.
This one is similar, but look: Perhaps it was a bit older when it’s down days came, or the damage was heavier, but this one is able not only to help a bit larger creature, but also to provide guaranteed dryness during storms. Who couldn’t use a friend like that!
But here is my favorite:
I knew I remembered this one and looked a long time to find it for you. I named it “Drama Queen” because of that look of surprise all over it. I imagine a friend I normally would not hang with a lot, because she is loud and pushy. Yet, I know I am safe with her and if I needed anything, big or small, she would be so glad to help me, to draw me in with what might seem like five or six arms, and would have a large base of resources to draw from.
Wounded? Yes, they all are.
Fine, straight, high dollar? Nope.
Just invaluable to someone and absolutely necessary in this ol’ life.
I know my readers love stories and this one is a doozy.
Do read it and wake up.
Here you will find the amazing story of the true purpose of censorship
and the true purpose of freedom of expression
in a world gone awry.
Do read it.
And wake up.
. . . Defend the cause of the fatherless . . . Isaiah 1:17
Isn’t this what families are for? We stick together and help the weaker among us. Right?
I’m not a Catholic, but we’re all part of the family of man, right?
This from Life News:
“Former House Speaker Nancy Pelosi is at it again, bashing Catholics for their pro-life position when she has promoted abortion in defiance of Catholic Church teaching at every turn.
“This time, Pelosi is upset that the nation’s Catholic bishops are protesting a potential O**** administration decision forcing insurance companies to cover birth control, contraception and drugs that could cause abortions. They say certain religious groups may not be exempt from providing the insurance, which would violate their moral and religious views.”
And then Pelosi added, ” . . . they have this conscience thing . . . ”
Read more here.
And be glad if you have a conscience. It is not a bad thing to have, no matter what anyone says.
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Image via Wikipedia
What if I do not forgive? What happens then?
Several things:
Here is what I used to teach my children when they were young and beginning to discover that relationship is not always all fun. Sometimes they would experience childish tussles and strike back or hold anger against others. So I said:
“If someone does something bad to you, it hurts. I know.
“But if you just do something back to them, it does not help you. You still hurt, and now they hurt, too. What good does that do?
“If you stay angry and then someone innocent comes along and, because of your hurt that you failed to get rid of, you strike out at that person, you STILL hurt, and that new person hurts, too.
“You are trying to get rid of your hurt by giving hurt to someone else. But when you give it to someone else, it does not mean they can take it AWAY from you. They may take it, but they cannot take it AWAY. You leave them hurting, too, and they may try to get rid of their hurt by giving hurt to yet someone else, who also cannot take it away.
“It’s a little like the flu. I can give it to you, but then I still have it; we both will have it. It just spreads.
“Only One person can take hurt AWAY, and that is God. If you give your hurt to Him, He can take it away from you and make you feel much better.”
Now, maybe that was too simple for an adult, but it is true. It’s what He died for. Why not try Him out?https://homescool.blog/2015/10/25/wrapped-in-a-bedsheet/
TOMORROW: A STORY ABOUT FORGIVENESS!
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Image via Wikipedia
There sure are a lot of wrong theories and sayings about forgiveness out there, these days! Most people have heard them all, too many times.
Still, although logic tells us something is wrong, we strain to forgive according to all the wrong theories we’ve heard.
We cannot figure it out.
Nothing seems to happen.
Several of our victimizers do not stay forgiven very long at all.
What!
To get a grasp on exactly what we are supposed to do, let’s first eliminate all wrong thinking upon which some people may be trying to convince us to act. For instance, forgiveness is not:
Denial
Forgiveness is NOT saying, “Oh, it’s okay.” When someone has done hurtful wrong against you, IT IS NOT OKAY!
It should make us feel all rotten inside to say it is.
Why? Because spreading wrongful hurt is not okay; it is sin. Sin is not okay with God; how could it be okay with us?
Saying it is okay, is denial. It’s just plain ol’ living a lie.
Only say, “It’s okay,” when it was not sin, was not intended as sin, and was not received as sin.
Only say, “It’s okay,” if you truly would be okay with it happening again.
Excuses
Forgiveness is NOT forgetting. How can anyone forget something on purpose!
We have miraculous brains that function largely by memory. We do not have back-space keys for our brains.
God can decide to forget something, if He wants, or He can cause us to forget something, but we do not have that kind of power.
Thinking we must forget, in order to prove we have forgiven, sets us up for making excuses. We say, “I’ll never be able to forgive that, because I just can’t forget what he did.” Or we think we have not forgiven because memories keep resurfacing.
We haven’t forgiven, obviously, because we still remember it?
So it must be hopeless to try?
What a wide-open door for excuses!
Folly
Forgiveness is NOT trusting. It is neither safe nor wise to trust someone who has proven himself to be untrustworthy.
To send a youngster back to a bullying classroom or molesting teacher, to lend more money to someone who has not repaid, to tell a secret to a gossip, is just plain folly.
Yes, we must forgive those who sin against us, but we do NOT have to trust them again, in order to prove we have done so.
We certainly do not have to feel guilty for helping put such a one in jail, if his sin was illegal.
Besides that, trust, by its very nature, must be earned, cannot be demanded.
So What IS Forgiveness?!
If we look up the word, “forgive,” we can find the original meanings of its ancient parts: to give far away, to “far-give”.
Think: Where would you put all that pain, if you could download it somewhere else? How far away would be far enough? Would sending it into another existence be far enough? It would do fine, for me.
The farthest possible distance from me, from this existence is:
In God’s hands. When He takes it, it’s gone.
Giving it to Him can feel like work, but it is forgiveness. And is far less work than dealing with your current agony. I know.
Now we have dealt with the why’s of suffering and forgiveness, and we have defined terms. Come on by tomorrow and get the HOW-TO and some FAQ’s.
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Image via Wikipedia
The man living to please his wife is afraid. He won’t measure up. He’ll make a mistake. He’s sure of it.
How did he get this way? Probably, he suffered at the hands of his parents.
However, he gets no relief from kicking himself unless he knows you’re happy, and convincing him of your happiness can be hard. His service to you goes beyond Christian charity. Face it: You are an idol in his life. He’ll likely fail to do much for the Lord unless he takes his eyes off you, turns around, and looks to Jesus.
Solution #6: How do you dance with a man who won’t lead? How tempting simply to express your opinion, let him fulfill your will, and live it up!
Yes, it is.
Is that Godly?
No, it is not.
God wants you to be a helper, fit for him, but he is afraid. He fears losing you, failing you, displeasing you…he fears YOU!
The fear of man (or woman) is a snare. God wants him to stand, throw off this fear, know the voice of Jesus, and walk in the light.
The fear of God is the beginning of wisdom.
It’s not your fault. Someone has done this to him, but you suffer, too. Someone has broken, squashed, or grated on your man, when he was a little boy. To him, anything would be worse than your displeasure. Somehow, someone has to undo this wrong.
The hard part is dying to yourself. If your husband had a physical handicap, you’d never think of tripping him when he walked. You’d gladly fetch his cane, rub liniment, or whatever, to help him heal.
Instead, his affliction is emotional. The things that trip him are the everyday nuances of personality that anyone else can bear. A pout, a sigh, or a frown make you appear to be unhappy. He is alarmed. He quizzes you. You resent it. He feels shut out. You feel helpless. It never ends.
You are in a powerful position, though, to minister healing in the name of Jesus.
You can convince him that it would please you most for him to ask God’s will instead of seeking yours. He will not be easy to convince.
You can encourage him to go ahead and risk making a mistake. He will despair over it, even in his sleep.
You can accept him, blunders, and all. He will be awaiting your rejection, instead.
He wants you to be his Light that shows him the way each day. God wants you to be the light in the window to draw him back home each night.
You can assure him that you will love him for a lifetime, no matter what. If it takes a lifetime, it truly does not matter. It is do-able. Minister acceptance to your husband and you will be an instrument in God’s hand to help him stand tall in the acceptance that is his in Jesus Christ. You will become the helper he needs, a helper that is fit for him, his helpmeet.
If he were a missionary, he would need a missionary helpmeet. If he were a lawyer, he would need a helpmeet who could maneuver in society. If he were poor, he would need a helpmeet who could follow a budget. If he were lame, he would need a helpmeet who could endure the smell of liniment.
Instead of these requirements, your husband needs mending. He needs time. He needs smiles. He needs space. Above all, he needs to know of your love on a daily, or even hourly basis. Tell him, show him, and prove to him, many times over, that you love him. Never think that now, finally, you have convinced him.
The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil. (Proverbs 31:11) So says Scripture of the good wife. It then lists the benefits the good wife provides for her husband so that he need not venture out for them. You can provide cheer, comfort, love, and acceptance for him. He need not look beyond your lovely face for hope. You can show him, even be for him the love of Jesus manifested into his life. You can help him see the hope that lies in Jesus.
Listen to this conversation between a married couple from Scripture: “We are doomed to die!” he said to his wife. “We have seen God!” But his wife answered, “If the LORD had meant to kill us, he would not have accepted a burnt offering and grain offering from our hands, nor shown us all these things or now told us this.” Can you see the way Samson’s mother tried to instill hope and joy into the heart of her husband, who was relating to good tidings from a basis of fear?
You can do the same. You can help your husband love God and look to Him for guidance. You can help him learn to trust in the love of God. You can help him relax in the presence of God. You can be good tidings, in his life. He will begin to trust you. He will join your children in rising up to call you blessed. He will begin to praise you. He will feel safe.
It will be the first time in his life.
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Image by Chris Campbell via Flickr
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