Posted in Good ol' days, Homemaking, Inspiring, Who's the mom here?, Wives

The Gift of Laundry

Laundry symbol hand wash
Hand wash only!

Did a bit of pioneering work today, and it was a fun challenge.

Basically, I had to haul water in a bucket to do laundry.

Oh, it’s not like it sounds. We have city water piped into our house and a faucet near the washing machine. But the hot water tank that feeds the washer goes out, now and then, and we find ourselves without hot water, back there, at inopportune times.

If we want to shower—our bath being connected to the laundry—we can use the guest bath, which has its own hot water. In fact, that bathroom is the only hot water source in the house during down times like this.

If I want to wash dishes, since the kitchen also is connected to the laundry, and I cannot use the dishwasher, I must haul hot water, from that other bathroom, to fill the sink and do dishes by hand. I was using a one-gallon pitcher. It takes about 2 ½ gallons to fill the sink nicely. It’s okay to rinse in cold.

However, I wanted to do laundry, so I found an old plastic scrub bucket that holds 2 gallons. That cut the trips in half. At first I thought of skipping laundry until tomorrow, but later, I asked myself, “How hard can it be? Millions of women have hauled water to do laundry, and that was uphill wearing long skirts.” I could do this.

The first trip across the house with a full bucket of hot water taught me balance. Heh heh.

When I dumped it into the washer, it all trickled to the space under the perforated drum that holds the clothing. What little bit that rose above that level quickly soaked into the clothes in the washer. It would take a lot more water.

I made about 8 trips with that bucket, across tiled and laminated floors. It was hard to feel patient and joyful, until I would remember those pioneer women and their long skirts, meandering trails, rocky paths strewn with slick leaves. Most of them were hauling cold water, too, that would need heating, next.

At least mine was already hot. At least mine was across a level surface. At least I did not have to wear all those billows of clothing.

After hauling the water I was in no hurry to drain it away. So I left the lid up and soaked that clothing for a while. I’m glad I did, for I got to thinking: That water was still hot and not dirty. If I could wring out the clothes in it, I could reuse it for the next load.

A familiar-looking basket of wrung-out clothing soon stood by my feet, and the next load was chugging along before I realized I was doing laundry the way my grandmother did before she got her wringer. I watched her when I was tiny, but I’d almost lost the memory.

Eventually I washed three small loads of clothing in one small load of hot water. What would have been sixty gallons of soapy water became only 20 or so.

I saw something, during this trial, namely, why my grandmother reused the water during laundry times. Even after all her laundry was done, there were still flower beds to water, and a porch to scrub.

She remembered hauling it up hill.

Read a great story that complements this idea, here.

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Image via wikipedia

Posted in Blessings of Habit, Good ol' days, Inspiring, Photos, Wisdom

The Gift of the Blue Mail Box

We have not dwelt in this “neck of the woods” very long. However, when we first arrived, we learned of The Blue Mail Box.

decorated with love
Decorated with Love

The Blue Mail Box is an actual place, marked on some maps. People in many surrounding towns could drive you straight to it because they know exactly what you mean when you say, “The Blue Mail Box,” and they know exactly where it is.

Yes, The Blue Mail Box is an actual place you can drive to, but it is also a place in history, a place in the hearts of many local people. You see, it stands for so much more than mail, although it does include mail. It stands for trust, cooperation, and grit. It stands for love-thy-neighbor. It stands for “. . . the howdy and the handshake, the laughter and the tears, the dream that’s been . . . ”

Yes. The Blue Mail Box is a has-been. It still exists, but the lovely things it represents exist only in history, only in hearts, only in memories.

I am sure the first time The Blue Mail Box was vandalized, it brought shock or pain to its extended family of devotees.

Now days, it enjoys protection–it’s been vandalized that much–as a memento of an innocent age we wish we could resume.

But no mail.

Who would try, these days, what was common occurrence back then?

Who would allow all the mail from one community to be deposited in one box with no lock, to be sorted through by anyone who lived there? Who would trust a neighbor to bring him his mail, since he was going that way, anyway? Who would kindly take old Widow Smith her mail, then open and read it for her?

No one in his right mind, that’s who. Not now days. But The Blue Mail Box was all that and more, once upon a time. Friends who chanced to meet at The Blue Mail Box would linger and visit. Surely a few surreptitious meetings between lovers occurred there, too, under the guise of “collecting Mama’s mail”? Probably notes, without postage, sometimes waited inside The Blue Mail Box, for folks who did not have phones to communicate with their neighbors.

But those days are over.

Half of it is illegal, these days, anyway.

Now days, when someone hears of The Blue Mail Box for the first time, they greet it with laughter, as I did. But as we grow to know these people, we realize the love that stood behind all that trust with each other’s mail. Elderly ladies smile as they tell of hi-jinks from school days. They boast of good preachers from back then.  They dream, starry-eyed, of past Christmas plays, spelling bees, weddings . . .

The Blue Mail Box is the stuff of real life, and we all should have something similar stuffed somewhere in the backs of our memories, for it once was the American way.

But we have allowed “them” to steal it from us and it is gone, isn’t it.

Except for the box.

We’ve thrown aside the gift and we’re playing with the box . . .

Posted in Believe it or not!, Good ol' days, Inspiring, Scripture, Wisdom

The Best Gift I Ever Received

Receive

You can build
On sand and be filled
With hopes that just wash away.

But there’s a Rock
That will unlock
All the fears you have of dying.

He wants to give life to you
And all He’s asking of you
Is to receive.

All the time
That you’ve been blind
He’s opened His love to you.

And now He’s here;
He’s calling in your ear,
Asking you to love Him, too.

He’s breathing life in you
And all He’s asking of you
Is to receive–

Receive.

Your life.

I never thought it could happen,
What happened to me:
That I could see Jesus
And be set free.

Oh, but I saw Him.
I loved Him.
And I saw me.
I saw the real me.

And so I got down on my knees
And I asked Him to help me believe
And I received.

I received.

My life.

Annie the Poet

Christian singer/songwriter, Annie Herring sin...
Annie
Posted in Blessings of Habit, Good ol' days, Health, Inspiring, Photos, Rain, Wives

Weekly Photo Challenge: Waiting

waiting
Waiting

These men are waiting. They may look like they are quite active, but I know them. One is 80 years old, and the other is not far behind him. They devote their days to making improvements they will never enjoy, such as planting trees on Arbor Day.

They do enjoy much of it, though. The ability to move about and act like men, still, free of huge medical problems, they enjoy. The camaraderie with other men who care about the future of our grandkids and great-grandkids, they enjoy. Rising early and dressing for work, like the good old days, they enjoy. They are real men, more so than some of their self-professed more virile co-males on this planet, who still lie abed at 10:30 a.m.

They gave up waiting for them.

The tree around which they just finished firming the soil is also waiting. The soil, the men discovered, was moist only down to about 8 inches.  On this overcast morning, everyone is hoping for rain. It does fall, 1/2 inch that night and 4 inches the next couple of days. In tree-years, it did not have to wait long.

The tree also is waiting for spring, to show off its promised beauty and to grow into the new soil around its roots. It is waiting to increase enough in size to shade the walking trail just beyond it. And someday, it will have waited until, like the men who planted it, the end will be very near and it will be ready for a position on a truck similar to the one parked in the background.

That truck also is waiting for someone who lives nearby to get going on this mid-morning. Is he lazy? Does he have the day off? Is he bound by a schedule that will not allow him to deliver his load until later?

Or is the driver also waiting? Did his wife sleep in and forget to make breakfast? Is he waiting for an important phone call before he begins his day? Is he waiting for the dryer to stop tumbling so he can finish dressing?

How inter-connected we all are! How much one slow one can affect it all!

Posted in Blessings of Habit, Good ol' days, Homemaking, Inspiring, Who's the mom here?, Wisdom

I Have Slept . . .

 . . . but I did not dream.

Dreaming about getting the laundry done.I love dreams, except for nightmares. I love recalling those crazy twisted dreams and trying to figure what was going on in my head that I could have thought such things when my mind was disengaged.

They say “house” dreams are about yourself, so the one I dreamed with the flooded basement probably was not a good sign. But what about the one where the staircase just went on forever with thousands of rooms on hundreds of floors, all furnished like a ritzy bed-and-breakfast? Hmm.

My other dreams, my wide-awake dreams where I plan how wonderful I will be next year, are another story. These dreams haunt me. I put them off, thinking I need some other thing to be just perfect before I can get started. You know the type: losing weight, writing a book, finishing crocheting that afghan, unpacking the last box from moving several years ago, etc. I know I should make some headway on at least some or at the very least one of these dreams, but the facts stand on the sidelines laughing at me.  The facts are that I don’t do what I could and I don’t know why.

I used to keep ironing up to date. Really. I used to keep my flower beds weeded. I used to weigh less.

I think partly I was living before my children and insisted on setting a good example at all times. Now they are grown and mostly gone and no one is watching me.

Except the Lord. He sees. He knows.

What I used to do because I believed I must do it, I now must learn to do only because it is right. My mind allows me choices these days, and I am surprised at who I see living underneath all the exterior rules I had made for myself.

I distinctly remember thinking, when the last child was off to college, “Whew! Now I can rest and do whatever I please. Finally! I am my own puppy!”

I think I need to rethink.

I have slept. It’s time to wake up.

Posted in Believe it or not!, Blessings of Habit, Good ol' days, Husbands, Inspiring, Wisdom

. . . and Thanksgiving Found!

Today is the second story, the one that makes yesterday’s post complete in expression of the beauty of blessings. If you didn’t read yesterday’s, you kind of have to read it now. Today’s won’t make as much sense without it.

Fast forward one year. It is Thanksgiving Day, again. We are planning the 500 mile trek home again. Our arm is better. We are playing more carefully, now. We are so totally ready, again.

But a lot has happened in another family we know. The family that opened its home to us last year, when we were sort of stranded, in a medical way of speaking, had lost its only source of income. The dad–we’ll call him Clarence–had been jobless for weeks, had found new employment several hours away and had moved his entire family there to be with him. Things were looking rather good for them and we rejoiced that after such a long trial, these kind people had found some relief from their troubles.

Clarence also had medical insurance at this new job and needed elective surgery. He chose the weekend of Thanksgiving for it because he had days off and so did his parents; they could all be together.

We visited with them over the phone a time or two before the surgery. He felt a bit uneasy, as anyone would before surgery, and Clarence and my husband were pretty good friends. Clarence would call my husband his best friend, but my husband is shy of being called by superlatives.

I think it was the Wednesday. You know–THE Wednesday before Thanksgiving. We were readying to go, I know that for sure. Then the call came. Clarence’s wife wanted prayer for his surgery. I told her of course we were praying. She said that no, she meant really, really pray, that something was not going right. She began to cry. I listened. My horror grew as I realized the medical terms she was quoting from the doctors were the warm-up words they use to prepare the family for death of the patient. I think she wanted me to help her accept this might be happening. I don’t remember what I said, but I did not want to commit myself to anything quotable until I had spoken with my husband.

I called my husband and told him what I thought. It did not register with him. He came home as early as he thought appropriate, and by then I had spoken several more times with Clarence’s wife and when my husband walked in the door I told him, “I think Clarence is dead.”

The grief that washed over him made me sorry I had to tell him.

He called the wife and spoke with her a bit. When he hung up, he said he was going immediately. He took our older son, Clarence’s older son’s best friend. The two of them stayed up all night waiting for the doctors to admit the truth: Clarence had suffered from a fatal reaction to the anesthesia. He had gone out of this life saying to his wife, “Something’s not right. Something’s not right. Tell them! Something’s not right.” She heard these, his last words, I am sure, forever, although that was maybe 12 or 15 years ago and she is happily remarried now.

grabschmuck-61204_640But my husband and my son were there. They were able to help Clarence’s family assimilate the truth and deal with the aftermath. This kind family who had opened their home to us during the previous Thanksgiving, now missing one member, were the needy ones. And although our plans were again foiled by the events around us, by troubles and tragedies around us, there was the blessing: We could be there for them.

And we realized: That Thanksgiving Dinner we had shared the year before was the last event, ever, that we shared with him before he moved his family and then died. If we had not had reason to stay home, we so would have missed that one last dinner.

And that was the 8th blessing.

And we know that in all things, God works for good with those who love Him . . . Romans 8:28

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Posted in Blessings of Habit, Brothers, Good ol' days, Health, Homemaking, Inspiring, Who's the mom here?, Wisdom, Wives, Womanhood

I Am Thankful for Thanksgiving Day

baked-216196_640

We don’t call it “turkey day”. We don’t even always have turkey.

But I love Thanksgiving Day. What other holiday do we celebrate that is totally intended to be 1.) Christian, and 2.) American?

So very few people actually are at all able to assimilate this truth.

But it is true: The celebration of Thanksgiving Day is a Christian and an American act, no matter who else joins in.

Or doesn’t.

We have always taken it quite seriously, too, often beginning with the five kernels of corn, proceeding to telling what we all are thankful for, and ending with glorious stuff topped with whipped cream, we do the whole thing.

All our kids and grandkids come to be with us that weekend, as opposed to the December holidays, when they run to their other in-laws. They all volunteer to bring food and the dear daughters-in-law have developed quite a repertoire they love to contribute: pumpkin pies, Polly’s Apple Pie!, sweet potato casserole, ham, dressing, whipped potatoes, blueberry pie, and Good Pie, so far.

Our one daughter does whatever needs doing as the day progresses, helping me like a sweet little slave, even helping clean her one remaining unmarried brother’s bedroom before he comes home from college, but her specialty is the banana-bread-bar-none.

Their dad and I contribute turkey, corn, peas, apple gelatin, cranberry sauce, whipped cream, cherry pie, raisin pie, olives, pickles, sausages, and oh, a whole lot more.

They all stay with us, here, in our house or in our guest house, for most of the entire weekend, usually arriving on Wednesday. That night I supply two soups, something venison, and something special. This year it was venison chili, and pumpkin soup, a whim, for me. You see, it is my tradition that I make one “whim” soup.

Another tradition is that my husband goes a little crazy at the grocery and comes home with several $6 bottles of pickled things like jalapeno-stuffed olives or hot vegetable mix. Mmm! The two stoves and three refrigerators stay maxed out.

We have the big meal on Thursday for lunch, at noonish, but we don’t really worry about the clock. We play games like Balderdash and Scattergories, we eat leftovers forever, and we laugh ourselves silly. I’ve noticed the daughters-in-law developing very good relationships with each other and it gives me joy. I love it.

My enemy hates it. I think he hates the show of a whole family being joyful together. I know he hates the act of giving thanks. And, of course, being our enemy, he hates us.

What makes me say all that? Well . . .

I’m trying to think of a single Thanksgiving Day that he did not try to spoil.

  1. One year, back before we had our own grown kids and were still going home to our own parents, we hit a dog and could not make the trip as planned because of a ruined radiator.
  2. Another year, we were rear-ended in rush hour traffic, making us unable to make the trip because the trunk would not open for our luggage.
  3. Another year, we were hit in an intersection by someone who did not know how to drive on ice.
  4. Once, one of our sons broke an arm and needed surgical repair and overnight observation.
  5. Once, one son got diarrhea and was admitted to the hospital for dehydration. And then my husband had a wreck. Same year.
  6. Once, one of my husband’s best friends died and we stayed here for the funeral.
  7. We hit a couple of deer and all the body shops were booked until January.
  8. One time, our fridge conked out. (It was 2 years old.)
  9. Once, I got sick.
  10. Once, my husband and I both got sick.

All these happened on or just before individual Thanksgiving Day weekends. I know once I post this, I will slap my head because I have just remembered the one I forgot.

We get tired of these attacks. Number 10, above, is this year. (2011) I have a fever and a cough as I type this. My head hurts. I did not get to play games with my family, for fear of infecting them with we-know-not-what, since the doctors are closed this weekend.

My wonderful daughters-in-law ran my kitchen like pros and everyone but me had a lovely time.

But I had a lovely time, in a small way. From my bedroom where I quarantined myself for the sake of their health, and because I truly felt like crud, I could hear how wonderfully my family plays and laughs and carries on despite adversity. And from my bedroom, I loved them.

And Thanksgiving Day.